heylads单词英语怎么读
1. 急需一篇幽默的英语短文！五分钟左右的！快。。。。。。。。。。。。
英语幽默：Second language
A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she spotted a cat crouched behind a bush. She watched the cat, and the cat watched the mice.
Mother mouse barked fiercely, "Woof, woof, woof!" The cat was so terrified that it ran for it's life.
Mother mouse turned to her babies and said, "Now, do you understand the value of a second language?"
一只母老鼠带着孩子出来散步，突然她看见一只猫正在灌木丛中虎视耽耽。
母老鼠向着猫叫道：“汪，汪，汪”，猫听了非常害怕，拼命跑走了。
母老鼠回过头洋洋自得的对孩子说：“现在你知道外语的重要性了吧。”
Catch a cold 得感冒
During the fight, the boxer swiped the air furiously, but could not hit his opponent.
"How am I doing?" he asked the coach at the end of the round.
"Well, if you keep this up," replied the coach, "he might feel the wind and catch a cold."
http://enghumor.anyp.cn/040227092045218.aspx
参考资料：http://enghumor.anyp.cn/040227092045218.aspx
1.CLINTON'S BIGGEST BILL
President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approach him.
"What is it?" exclaims the President.
"It's the Abortion Bill, Mr. President - what do you want to do about it?"
"Just go ahead and pay it."
2.A lady bought a new $100,000 Mercedes and proudly drove it off the showroom floor to take home. Halfway home, she attempted to change radio stations and saw that there appeared to be only one station. She immediately turned around and headed back to the dealer.
Once at the dealer, she found her salesman and began to excitedly explain that her radio was not working, and they must replace it since she only had one radio station. The salesman calmed her down and told her that her car radio was voice-activated, and that she would only need to state aloud the type of music that she wanted and the car would find it.
She got into the car and started the engine and then said the word "country," and the radio changed to a station playing a George Strait song. She was satisfied and started home. After a while she decided to try out the radio and said "rock 'n' roll;" the radio station changed and a song by the Rolling Stones came from the speakers. Quite pleased, the woman continued driving.
A few blocks from her house, another driver ran a light causing her to slam on her brakes to avoid a collision. The woman angrily exclaimed, "Asshole!"
...The radio cut over to George Bush's press conference.
3.ORDERING DINNER
Bill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight's special is chicken almondine and fresh fish.
"The chicken sounds good, I'll have that," Hillary says.
The waiter nods: "And the vegetable?" he asks.
"Oh, HE'll have the fish," Hillary replies.
4.911 EMERGENCY NUMBER
Shortly after the 911 emergency number became available, an elderly and quite ill lady appeared in a hospital emergency room, having driven herself to the hospital and barely managing to stagger in from the parking lot.
The horrified nurse said, "Why didn't you call the 911 number and get an ambulance?"
The lady said, "My phone doesn't have an eleven."
5.THE DEAF WIFE
A man is talking to the family doctor. "Doc, I think my wife's going deaf."
The doctor answers, "Well, here's something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. Then you'll be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really is."
The man goes home and tries it out. He walks in the door and says, "Honey, what's for dinner?" He doesn't hear an answer, so he moves closer to her. "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still no answer. He repeats this several times, until he's standing just a few feet away from her.
Finally, she answers, "For the eleventh time, I said we're having MEATLOAF!"
6.BILL TAKES A PLANE RIDE
One night, a Delta twin-engine puddle jumper was flying somewhere above New Jersey. There were five people on board: the pilot, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, The Dali Lama, and a hippie.
Suddenly, an illegal oxygen generator exploded loudly in the luggage compartment, and the passenger cabin began to fill with smoke. The cockpit door opened, and the pilot burst into the compartment. "Gentlemen," he began, "I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that we're about to crash in New Jersey. The good news is that there are four parachutes, and I have one of them!" With that, the pilot threw open the door and jumped from the plane.
Michael Jordan was on his feet in a flash. "Gentlemen," he said, "I am the world's greatest athlete. The world needs great athletes. I think the world's greatest athlete should have a parachute!" With these words, he grabbed one of the remaining parachutes, and hurtled through the door and into the night.
Bill Gates rose and said, "Gentlemen, I am the world's smartest man. The world needs smart men. I think the world's smartest man should have parachute, too." He grabbed one, and out he jumped.
The Dali Lama and the hippie looked at one another. Finally, the Dali Lama spoke. "My son," he said, "I have lived a satisfying life and have known the bliss of True Enlightenment. You have your life ahead of you, you take a parachute, and I will go down with the plane."
The hippie smiled slowly and said, "Hey, don't worry, pop. The world's smartest man just jumped out wearing my backpack."
7.THE PROFESSOR OF ECONOMICS
An economics professor at school had a strict policy that the hourly examinations were to be completed at the bell and anyone who kept writing on their exam after the bell would take a zero on the exam.
Well, one guy kept writing on his exam for a while after the bell and then confidently strode up to turn it in. The professor looked at him and said, "Don't bother to hand that paper in... you get a zero for continuing after the bell."
The guy looked at him and said, "Professor, do you know who I am!"
The professor replied, "No, and I don't care if your dad is president of the United States...you get a zero on this exam"
The guy, with a enraged look on his face, shouted, "You mean you have no idea who I am?"
The professor responded, "No, I've no idea who you think you are."
With that, the guy said "Good!" plunged his exam into the middle of the stack of other student's exams, and did a hasty retreat from the examination room!
8.PRESENTS FOR TEACHER
On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher. The florist's son handed the teacher a gift. She shook it, held it up and said, "I bet I know what it is - it's some flowers!"
"That's right!" shouted the little boy.
Then the candy store owner's daughter handed the teacher a gift She held it up, shook it and said. "I bet I know what it is - it's a box of candy!"
"That's right!" shouted the little girl.
The next gift was from the liquor store owner's son. The teacher held it up and saw that it was leaking. She touched a drop with her finger and tasted it. "Is it wine?" she asked.
"No," the boy answered.
The teacher touched another drop to her tongue. "Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," the boy answered.
Finally, the teacher said, "I give up. What is it?"
The boy replied, "A puppy!"
9.DRUNK DRIVING STORIES
Three blokes are driving around, drinking beers and having a laugh when the driver looks in the mirror and sees the flashing lights of a police car telling him to pull over.
The other two are really worried. "What are we going to do with our beers? We're in trouble!"
"No," the driver says, "it's OK, just pull the label off your bottle and stick them on your foreheads, and the bloke pulls over.
The police officer then walks up and says, "You lads were swerving all around the road back there. Have you been drinking?"
"Oh, no, officer," says the driver, pointing to his forehead, "We're trying to give up, so we're on the patch."
10.SMALL TOWN COPS
A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain."
"Quiet!" snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you spend the night in jail until the chief gets back."
"But, officer, I just wanted to say,"
"And I said be quiet! You're going to jail!"
A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you, the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."
"Don't count on it," answered the guy in the cell. "I'm the groom."
http://www.comedy-zone.net/jokes/laugh/crime/crime4.htm
2. 急求10篇英语小短文
英语幽默：Second language
A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she spotted a cat crouched behind a bush. She watched the cat, and the cat watched the mice.
Mother mouse barked fiercely, "Woof, woof, woof!" The cat was so terrified that it ran for it's life.
Mother mouse turned to her babies and said, "Now, do you understand the value of a second language?"
一只母老鼠带着孩子出来散步，突然她看见一只猫正在灌木丛中虎视耽耽。
母老鼠向着猫叫道：“汪，汪，汪”，猫听了非常害怕，拼命跑走了。
母老鼠回过头洋洋自得的对孩子说：“现在你知道外语的重要性了吧。”
Catch a cold 得感冒
During the fight, the boxer swiped the air furiously, but could not hit his opponent.
"How am I doing?" he asked the coach at the end of the round.
"Well, if you keep this up," replied the coach, "he might feel the wind and catch a cold."
1.CLINTON'S BIGGEST BILL
President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approach him.
"What is it?" exclaims the President.
"It's the Abortion Bill, Mr. President - what do you want to do about it?"
"Just go ahead and pay it."
2.A lady bought a new $100,000 Mercedes and proudly drove it off the showroom floor to take home. Halfway home, she attempted to change radio stations and saw that there appeared to be only one station. She immediately turned around and headed back to the dealer.
Once at the dealer, she found her salesman and began to excitedly explain that her radio was not working, and they must replace it since she only had one radio station. The salesman calmed her down and told her that her car radio was voice-activated, and that she would only need to state aloud the type of music that she wanted and the car would find it.
She got into the car and started the engine and then said the word "country," and the radio changed to a station playing a George Strait song. She was satisfied and started home. After a while she decided to try out the radio and said "rock 'n' roll;" the radio station changed and a song by the Rolling Stones came from the speakers. Quite pleased, the woman continued driving.
A few blocks from her house, another driver ran a light causing her to slam on her brakes to avoid a collision. The woman angrily exclaimed, "Asshole!"
...The radio cut over to George Bush's press conference.
3.ORDERING DINNER
Bill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight's special is chicken almondine and fresh fish.
"The chicken sounds good, I'll have that," Hillary says.
The waiter nods: "And the vegetable?" he asks.
"Oh, HE'll have the fish," Hillary replies.
4.911 EMERGENCY NUMBER
Shortly after the 911 emergency number became available, an elderly and quite ill lady appeared in a hospital emergency room, having driven herself to the hospital and barely managing to stagger in from the parking lot.
The horrified nurse said, "Why didn't you call the 911 number and get an ambulance?"
The lady said, "My phone doesn't have an eleven."
5.THE DEAF WIFE
A man is talking to the family doctor. "Doc, I think my wife's going deaf."
The doctor answers, "Well, here's something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. Then you'll be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really is."
The man goes home and tries it out. He walks in the door and says, "Honey, what's for dinner?" He doesn't hear an answer, so he moves closer to her. "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still no answer. He repeats this several times, until he's standing just a few feet away from her.
Finally, she answers, "For the eleventh time, I said we're having MEATLOAF!"
6.BILL TAKES A PLANE RIDE
One night, a Delta twin-engine puddle jumper was flying somewhere above New Jersey. There were five people on board: the pilot, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, The Dali Lama, and a hippie.
Suddenly, an illegal oxygen generator exploded loudly in the luggage compartment, and the passenger cabin began to fill with smoke. The cockpit door opened, and the pilot burst into the compartment. "Gentlemen," he began, "I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that we're about to crash in New Jersey. The good news is that there are four parachutes, and I have one of them!" With that, the pilot threw open the door and jumped from the plane.
Michael Jordan was on his feet in a flash. "Gentlemen," he said, "I am the world's greatest athlete. The world needs great athletes. I think the world's greatest athlete should have a parachute!" With these words, he grabbed one of the remaining parachutes, and hurtled through the door and into the night.
Bill Gates rose and said, "Gentlemen, I am the world's smartest man. The world needs smart men. I think the world's smartest man should have parachute, too." He grabbed one, and out he jumped.
The Dali Lama and the hippie looked at one another. Finally, the Dali Lama spoke. "My son," he said, "I have lived a satisfying life and have known the bliss of True Enlightenment. You have your life ahead of you, you take a parachute, and I will go down with the plane."
The hippie smiled slowly and said, "Hey, don't worry, pop. The world's smartest man just jumped out wearing my backpack."
7.THE PROFESSOR OF ECONOMICS
An economics professor at school had a strict policy that the hourly examinations were to be completed at the bell and anyone who kept writing on their exam after the bell would take a zero on the exam.
Well, one guy kept writing on his exam for a while after the bell and then confidently strode up to turn it in. The professor looked at him and said, "Don't bother to hand that paper in... you get a zero for continuing after the bell."
The guy looked at him and said, "Professor, do you know who I am!"
The professor replied, "No, and I don't care if your dad is president of the United States...you get a zero on this exam"
The guy, with a enraged look on his face, shouted, "You mean you have no idea who I am?"
The professor responded, "No, I've no idea who you think you are."
With that, the guy said "Good!" plunged his exam into the middle of the stack of other student's exams, and did a hasty retreat from the examination room!
8.PRESENTS FOR TEACHER
On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher. The florist's son handed the teacher a gift. She shook it, held it up and said, "I bet I know what it is - it's some flowers!"
"That's right!" shouted the little boy.
Then the candy store owner's daughter handed the teacher a gift She held it up, shook it and said. "I bet I know what it is - it's a box of candy!"
"That's right!" shouted the little girl.
The next gift was from the liquor store owner's son. The teacher held it up and saw that it was leaking. She touched a drop with her finger and tasted it. "Is it wine?" she asked.
"No," the boy answered.
The teacher touched another drop to her tongue. "Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," the boy answered.
Finally, the teacher said, "I give up. What is it?"
The boy replied, "A puppy!"
9.DRUNK DRIVING STORIES
Three blokes are driving around, drinking beers and having a laugh when the driver looks in the mirror and sees the flashing lights of a police car telling him to pull over.
The other two are really worried. "What are we going to do with our beers? We're in trouble!"
"No," the driver says, "it's OK, just pull the label off your bottle and stick them on your foreheads, and the bloke pulls over.
The police officer then walks up and says, "You lads were swerving all around the road back there. Have you been drinking?"
"Oh, no, officer," says the driver, pointing to his forehead, "We're trying to give up, so we're on the patch."
10.SMALL TOWN COPS
A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain."
"Quiet!" snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you spend the night in jail until the chief gets back."
"But, officer, I just wanted to say,"
"And I said be quiet! You're going to jail!"
A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you, the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."
"Don't count on it," answered the guy in the cell. "I'm the groom."
3. 有没有标准的英语笑话
Second language
A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she spotted a cat crouched behind a bush. She watched the cat, and the cat watched the mice.
Mother mouse barked fiercely, "Woof, woof, woof!" The cat was so terrified that it ran for it's life.
Mother mouse turned to her babies and said, "Now, do you understand the value of a second language?"
Catch a cold 得感冒
During the fight, the boxer swiped the air furiously, but could not hit his opponent.
"How am I doing?" he asked the coach at the end of the round.
"Well, if you keep this up," replied the coach, "he might feel the wind and catch a cold."
1.CLINTON'S BIGGEST BILL
President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approach him.
"What is it?" exclaims the President.
"It's the Abortion Bill, Mr. President - what do you want to do about it?"
"Just go ahead and pay it."
2.A lady bought a new $100,000 Mercedes and proudly drove it off the showroom floor to take home. Halfway home, she attempted to change radio stations and saw that there appeared to be only one station. She immediately turned around and headed back to the dealer.
Once at the dealer, she found her salesman and began to excitedly explain that her radio was not working, and they must replace it since she only had one radio station. The salesman calmed her down and told her that her car radio was voice-activated, and that she would only need to state aloud the type of music that she wanted and the car would find it.
She got into the car and started the engine and then said the word "country," and the radio changed to a station playing a George Strait song. She was satisfied and started home. After a while she decided to try out the radio and said "rock 'n' roll;" the radio station changed and a song by the Rolling Stones came from the speakers. Quite pleased, the woman continued driving.
A few blocks from her house, another driver ran a light causing her to slam on her brakes to avoid a collision. The woman angrily exclaimed, "Asshole!"
...The radio cut over to George Bush's press conference.
3.ORDERING DINNER
Bill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight's special is chicken almondine and fresh fish.
"The chicken sounds good, I'll have that," Hillary says.
The waiter nods: "And the vegetable?" he asks.
"Oh, HE'll have the fish," Hillary replies.
4.911 EMERGENCY NUMBER
Shortly after the 911 emergency number became available, an elderly and quite ill lady appeared in a hospital emergency room, having driven herself to the hospital and barely managing to stagger in from the parking lot.
The horrified nurse said, "Why didn't you call the 911 number and get an ambulance?"
The lady said, "My phone doesn't have an eleven."
5.THE DEAF WIFE
A man is talking to the family doctor. "Doc, I think my wife's going deaf."
The doctor answers, "Well, here's something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. Then you'll be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really is."
The man goes home and tries it out. He walks in the door and says, "Honey, what's for dinner?" He doesn't hear an answer, so he moves closer to her. "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still no answer. He repeats this several times, until he's standing just a few feet away from her.
Finally, she answers, "For the eleventh time, I said we're having MEATLOAF!"
6.BILL TAKES A PLANE RIDE
One night, a Delta twin-engine puddle jumper was flying somewhere above New Jersey. There were five people on board: the pilot, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, The Dali Lama, and a hippie.
Suddenly, an illegal oxygen generator exploded loudly in the luggage compartment, and the passenger cabin began to fill with smoke. The cockpit door opened, and the pilot burst into the compartment. "Gentlemen," he began, "I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that we're about to crash in New Jersey. The good news is that there are four parachutes, and I have one of them!" With that, the pilot threw open the door and jumped from the plane.
Michael Jordan was on his feet in a flash. "Gentlemen," he said, "I am the world's greatest athlete. The world needs great athletes. I think the world's greatest athlete should have a parachute!" With these words, he grabbed one of the remaining parachutes, and hurtled through the door and into the night.
Bill Gates rose and said, "Gentlemen, I am the world's smartest man. The world needs smart men. I think the world's smartest man should have parachute, too." He grabbed one, and out he jumped.
The Dali Lama and the hippie looked at one another. Finally, the Dali Lama spoke. "My son," he said, "I have lived a satisfying life and have known the bliss of True Enlightenment. You have your life ahead of you, you take a parachute, and I will go down with the plane."
The hippie smiled slowly and said, "Hey, don't worry, pop. The world's smartest man just jumped out wearing my backpack."
7.THE PROFESSOR OF ECONOMICS
An economics professor at school had a strict policy that the hourly examinations were to be completed at the bell and anyone who kept writing on their exam after the bell would take a zero on the exam.
Well, one guy kept writing on his exam for a while after the bell and then confidently strode up to turn it in. The professor looked at him and said, "Don't bother to hand that paper in... you get a zero for continuing after the bell."
The guy looked at him and said, "Professor, do you know who I am!"
The professor replied, "No, and I don't care if your dad is president of the United States...you get a zero on this exam"
The guy, with a enraged look on his face, shouted, "You mean you have no idea who I am?"
The professor responded, "No, I've no idea who you think you are."
With that, the guy said "Good!" plunged his exam into the middle of the stack of other student's exams, and did a hasty retreat from the examination room!
8.PRESENTS FOR TEACHER
On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher. The florist's son handed the teacher a gift. She shook it, held it up and said, "I bet I know what it is - it's some flowers!"
"That's right!" shouted the little boy.
Then the candy store owner's daughter handed the teacher a gift She held it up, shook it and said. "I bet I know what it is - it's a box of candy!"
"That's right!" shouted the little girl.
The next gift was from the liquor store owner's son. The teacher held it up and saw that it was leaking. She touched a drop with her finger and tasted it. "Is it wine?" she asked.
"No," the boy answered.
The teacher touched another drop to her tongue. "Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," the boy answered.
Finally, the teacher said, "I give up. What is it?"
The boy replied, "A puppy!"
9.DRUNK DRIVING STORIES
Three blokes are driving around, drinking beers and having a laugh when the driver looks in the mirror and sees the flashing lights of a police car telling him to pull over.
The other two are really worried. "What are we going to do with our beers? We're in trouble!"
"No," the driver says, "it's OK, just pull the label off your bottle and stick them on your foreheads, and the bloke pulls over.
The police officer then walks up and says, "You lads were swerving all around the road back there. Have you been drinking?"
"Oh, no, officer," says the driver, pointing to his forehead, "We're trying to give up, so we're on the patch."
10.SMALL TOWN COPS
A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain."
"Quiet!" snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you spend the night in jail until the chief gets back."
"But, officer, I just wanted to say,"
"And I said be quiet! You're going to jail!"
A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you, the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."
"Don't count on it," answered the guy in the cell. "I'm the groom."
4. 谁能介绍些经典的英文歌 最好是抒情的
lene marlin-a place nearby
温柔醇厚的声音，静静地用心体会，很舒服21的挪威女孩marlin，清丽的声音，合着淳朴的吉他声，伴着悠扬的击鼓…
bon jovi-say it isn't so
我唯一觉的好听的重摇滚，这是张汇聚bon jovi团员5年来心情写照、不加刻意不添矫情便浑然天成的摇滚专辑.
gareth gates-anyone of us
这首歌曲实在是非常动听，顺利拿下了冠军宝座，相信很多朋友也都很喜欢！如果你还没听过，那一定要留意这首歌！
britney spears-baby one more time
小甜甜布兰妮的经典，不多说她的处女作---大碟《baby one more time》刚推出就一举打上美国billboard单曲榜的榜首.
helene segara-encore une fois
法国当红歌手helene segara专辑,她的音乐和她的人一样别有风情,将法国浓郁的浪漫气息带给你.
eminem-stan
非常好听的rap曲风，这是当年超红的单曲，dido也是因为这个才红的。这首歌曲也是被非英语国家的孩子们所喜爱的，因为语速不是很快。
马修连恩-bressanone
可象天籁之声啊，让人如痴如醉，用一个最俗的词儿:百听不厌很难用语言表述听bressanone的感受.突然，想起当年听齐秦《狼》时的情形...
celine dion-a new day has come
再度演绎《my heart will go on》之经典作品席琳迪翁在暂别歌坛复出后，首支单曲旋即成为全球播歌排行和听众点播冠军！
enrique iglesias-hero
情歌王子恩里克-伊格里莱斯，好听啊，心灵为之一震全球狂恋至爱 拉丁情人再占流行排行billboard no.3最佳情歌力作.
groove coverage-far away from home
好久没听到这么好听的歌了，groove coverage带给你全新的感觉，歌声很性感.被众多知名dj誉为当今舞曲最为精华的传世之作.
nelly kellyrowland-dilemma
由nelly及destiny schild成员kellyrowland合唱，这首虽然风格老套，但仍然在全美电台创下近两个月蝉联冠军宝座的纪录.
nana-lonely
英文歌曲，大家知道吗，同样很好听哦.
phil collins-anotherday in paradise
翻译过来就是天堂里的另一天，堪称百听不厌，欧美经典.
caron nightingale-promises dont't come easy
温暖的中音与蔡琴颇有些相似，舒缓的演唱娓娓道来，使之成为一首百听不厌的好歌.
westlife-my love
大家太熟悉了吧，没听过的快下.
t.a.t.u-stars
来自俄国的一对18岁的女孩组合~声音真好近乎呐喊般的狂野歌唱，再加上快速得令人几乎窒息、迷炫的电子节奏...
lauren christy-the color of the night
夜之色，欧美经典影视名曲.
emilia-big big world
别说你没听过.
george winston-canon
《卡农》我的野蛮女友里的插曲，很好听，据说有很多版本，我这个是钢琴的.
mariah carey&
whitney houston-when you believe
玛丽亚.凯莉与惠特尼.休斯敦的携手佳作.
beatles-let it be
经典经典，kang ta和燕姿也翻唱过，不过感觉原唱的更好听.
Sarah Brightman-time to say goodbye
太棒的歌声了，是由莎拉和盲人男歌手合唱的，整首歌曲旋律优美，演绎经典，男女声的配合浑然一体，令人神魂颠倒.
baby vox-loveless
8错8错，日韩歌听得少，好喜欢hot啊，可惜解散的太早，可惜啊.
sweetbox-everything gonna be alright
强力推荐兰蔻[o*oui]香水电视广告曲(巴哈g弦之歌)。sweetbox绝对是与众不同的一道风景！
jeanette-porque te vas
又一个甜甜的声音，好听哦，超可爱的歌曲，是部电影的音乐《巴黎感觉》片头曲.
S.E.S-dreams come true
网友推荐的，还不错.在韩国发行的第二张韩文专辑，蝉联全韩流行音乐榜《韩国km-tv排行榜》榜首.
donna lewis-i could be the one
极力推荐，超可爱声音donna*lewis的声音清纯飘逸，歌曲编排轻灵又不失流行动感，曾经在美国被称为流行的enya.
helene rolles-je m appelle helene
我的名字是伊莲。清新隽永的曲调，深夜触动你的心灵，蝉联法国榜冠军，特别推荐！
dido-life for rent
好听，醇厚的声音.
enya-only time
enya推出的《onlytime》套装精选专辑，将她的事业再度推向了一个新的顶峰.
mltr-you took my heart away
舒缓的节奏，简洁的编曲，十足的优美旋律，都展现了mltr最擅长的催情功力，动听程度仍然屡试不爽.
Richard Marx-right here waiting
理查.马克斯-此情可待，经典啊.
Mariah Carey-without you
失去你(未来水世界主题曲)，太经典了，当时第一次听的时候简直惊呆了，原来世界上还有这种声音，惊为天人！
bryan adams-back to you
好听的摇滚，感觉很棒，推荐来自加拿大以heaven一举成名的抒情摇滚王子布莱恩亚当斯，有着招牌的感性沙哑嗓音...
backstreet boys后街男孩-i want it that way
5个大男孩醇厚的声音让你欲罢不能，欧美经典人气组合，创下145家电台播放冠军的纪录，十分好听.
莎拉布莱曼-scarboroughfair
超经典，原唱.温暖的和声穿梭自如，低吟着美妙的叙事诗。他们不止是歌者，他们是游吟诗人
celine dion-the power of love
听起来大气，让你体验荡气回肠的感觉，展现其宽广的音域和强劲厚实的该高音单曲享誉全球.
Yanni-with an orchid
翻译过来就是和兰花一起，超动听旋律，这只曲目也是凤凰卫视“凤凰气象站”的背景音乐.
5. 举些例子：因为美式英语与英式英语的意思不同而产生的误会
有人在美国拉斯维加斯的时候曾经在餐厅里向服务生要“napkin”，服务生很纳闷，为什么你找我要“尿布”呢？原来“napkin”在最初在英语中指的是小孩用的尿布，而“餐巾纸”这种含义则在只在美国东部比较流行。
pants‘这个词在美语中是’裤子‘的意思，但在’英式英语‘中却是’内裤‘的意思。如果美国人对英国人说’your pants is very pretty。‘英国人就会认为你这个美国人没素质。
英式英语(English English)和美式英语(American English)的差别是客观存在的，并且在语法上也是有一定差别的。
其实，不单是语法结构方面如此，甚至单词的使用也有这样的倾向。这是说，在"英式英语"和"美式英语"中，假若是用不同的词汇表达同一个意思的，那么，使用"美式英语"的人远较使用"英式英语"者多。
笔者曾对一些用词作过研究，藉此判别上述这种趋势是否普遍存在，结果是肯定的。根据一些英美人士所作的调查，在日常应用的词汇中，"英式英语"和"美式英语"各有表达用语的大约有一千个，其中通用的占了大部分。但所谓"通用"，其实是指英国人采纳了美国人的用词而已。在英、美两国本土以外的地区，使用英文的人习惯了"美式英语"而少用"英式英语"者亦占了大多数。
以下举一些例子说明上述情况的表现。
Antenna，aerial（前者为"美式英语"，后者为"英式英语"，下同）--泛指无线电上使用的"天线"，但antenna远比aerial（或aerial wire）流行。
Apartment，flat--指大厦中的住宅单位，前者也被译为"（住宅）公寓"。不过，东南亚地区目前流行用"座"来表达，故使用flat的机会较多。
Ash，can；st，bin--指垃圾箱。在美式英语中，含有同等词义的还有garbage can和junk一heap，但英式英语则只有st一bin（或st-bin）.香港目前多用stbin。但废纸篓的两种称呼分别是waste一basket和waste一paper basket，流行度则似乎相等。
Automobile，motor-car--汽车。美式英语很多时更简为auto，如"车祸"即称为auto accident。两个字的使用度似乎相差不大。
Baggage，luggage--行李。这两个字都是总称，故此不能说a baggage（或luggage），而应说a piece of baggage（或luggage），two pieces of baggage等。流行度好像没有多大差别，但要注意：当美国人用luggage的时候，一般是指大的皮箱或皮包。美国人说baggage car（行李车）英国人则说luggage van。
Bank，bill；bank，note--纸币，钞票。Bank-bill是美国人的钞票，但是英国人却用来指"银行与银行之间的汇票"，以bank一note较为流行。campus， school grounds---校园，学校场地。由于美国学上运动近年甚为蓬勃，故此campus一字常见应用，school一grounds则罕有所闻。campus所指的范围包括了整个学校（多指大学）的场地，而非单指花园、操场等开阔的地方。例如campus activities是指大学的"校内活动"，campus building是大学内的建筑群等等。
Canned goods，tinned goods--罐头食物。can和tin是美式英语和英式英语中的同义词，均指保藏预制食物的罐头，tin有时更被音译为："听"。这两个字同时亦可以作动词使用，解作"把食物装罐"。在使用上,canned goods比tinned goods流行。
Department store，stores--百货公司。美国人口中的store，相当于英国人的 shop。百货公司一般规模较普通商店大，分为若干部门(depar-tment)，故称为 departmentstore是很贴切的。这个用词在英国也逐渐流行，代替了英国沿用的stores。
Drawers，Pants--内裤。这两个字的用法应特别留意。Pants在英国指内裤，但在美国却是长裤。(在英国，长裤为 trousers。)所以，当一位外国人说 Pants的时候，你要弄清楚他究竟是英国人还是美国人，不要把内裤变成了长裤。
Editorial，Leading article--社论。英式英语中除了leading article外， Leader一字也可用来指社论。但现时editorial用得最多，甚至香港的《南华早报》(South China Morning Post)也用 ditorial来指其社论。
Gasoline，petrol--汽油。 gasoline有时也写作 gasoline，口语上更可简写为 gas。汽油站是gas Station(＝英 Petrol station)，也可说gasoline station。但是， gasoline bomb(汽油弹)却不能说是 gas bomb。
Long-distance call，trunk call--长途电话。美式英语的 Iong-distance call词义一看便明，远胜于英式英语的trunk call，自然被多数采用。
Overcoat，great coat--大衣，大氅。两字的通用度差不多，但overcoat似乎稍胜一筹。
Radio，wireless--收音机。原本两字后都有set，即radio set及 wireless set，但为了节省，一般都略去。两个字中，当然是美式英语radio流行得多。
Second floor，first floor--二楼。这种对楼宇的层数的称呼方法在不少地区造成了很大的不便。以往，许多楼宇按英式英语的叫法，故此问题尚不大。但近年来，不少的楼宇使用了美式英语的叫法，因此就产生了混乱。现在一般对人家说第若干层楼时，一定要附带说一声“电梯多少字”，以免误会。
Soft-drinks，Minerals--软饮品：汽水等不含酒精的饮料。美式英语的soft-drinks原来泛指不含酒精的饮料，包括汽水和果汁等，现时多用来指汽水，代替了原先的 air-ate water。英式英语的 minerals由于没有 soft-drains那么通行，故此用来指汽水的机会少了，但比较多用来指矿泉水，等于 mineral water。
字母Z的不同读法
这里特别提出英文字母Z的发音问题。美国人念 zee，英国人念 zed。中国人受英国人影响较深，往往把 z 念成 zed，建议大家改一改习惯，按美国发音念 zee。我国许多北方人（包括不少电台广播员〕把 z 念成“贼”，则是非改不可的了。英文字母歌里的 z，不应是英国发音 zed，而应该念成 zee，跟后面的词 Now you see / I can say my ABC 押韵。
别客气和欢迎你
美国人表示“别客气”，“不用提”等意思，常说 You're welcome。英国人从来不用 You're welcome来表示“别客气”，如果他们说 You're welcome 的话，则意思是“欢迎你”。他们表示不用谢说 Not at all 或 Don't mention it。另外，正如前面已经讲过那样，美国人也说 sure 表示“不用谢”。所以，你在美国会听到这样的对话："Thank you." "Sure.”或“Thank you.”
“You're welcome.”这里需要提一下的是，在 You're welcome 里 welcome 是个形容词, 不能说成welcomed 。但是，welcome 也可以是动词，这就可能有词形变化。例如在 He was welcomed with kissed and hugs 这句话（人们以接吻和拥抱来欢迎他 )，welcome 必须写成 welcomed,以构成被动语态。
男孩和女孩
男孩是 boy，这是没有争议的。但是，英国人爱说 lad。例如，Round up a few of the lads for a game of football（找几个男孩来一起玩足球 )。男孩跟女孩谈恋爱，一种幼稚的恋爱，英国人会说 lad－and－girl love，美国人则说boy－and－girl love。英国人还把小男孩叫 laddie。美国人也很爱用 kid 这个词，不仅用来表示小孩，而且也表示年青人，如 college kids 就是大学生。除了kid 以外，美国人也用 kiddy 或 kiddie。
打电话的种种方式
除了telephone 和 phone 以外，美国人也爱用 call 这个词表示打电话，例如Call me at nine，不是九点钟喊我或拜访我。英国人则用 ring，例如Give me a ring when you have time (有空给我来个电话)，美国人打电话有那么几个种类：local call（本地区电话〕；long distance call（跨地区电话或国际长途电话)；overseas call（越洋长途电话)；collect call（对方付钱电话)；toll free call (免费电话)；emergency call（紧急电话)；operator assisted（接线员协助的电话)。Long distance call 最好在夜里11点钟以后打，价格可以便宜很多。Toll free call 是指 area code 为800的电话，美国许多公司为了鼓励客户打电话，或者政府机构向社会提供服务，用的都是800免费号码。Emergency call主要是指火警之类的电话。
朋友和老兄
美国英语 fellow 往往是指男性 a man，a boy，a boyfriend 或 an associate。美国人也用 guy 来称呼朋友，单数 guy 等于 fellow，指男性，复数 guys 男女都指。此外英语里还有 buddy，相当于中国话里的老兄或老弟。英国人不称呼别人为 guy，因为guy 在英国英语里指一个衣着古怪的人。英国人用 bloke 或 chap来称呼朋友，但这两个词意义上稍有区别，chap 是一个 much trusted male friend ，而 bloke 则是 someone who is friendly but not someone you know that well，也就是说 chap 要比bloke 更亲切些。
6. 有没有《灰姑娘》的英语短剧剧本急~~~~~
Parish of St Mary, Harrington
Pantomime Script
Here you find the script of the Cinderella pantomime we put on. If you find anything you can use, just go ahead and use it. All we ask is that you let us know if you have found this script helpful for anything you are doing by contacting us.
Also available: Robin Hood pantomime Script
Snow White and the 7 Aliens
Return in St Mary's home page
Cinderella
written by Judith Dixon
Opening Song
Scene 1 – the Kitchen
Cinderella is ironing and singing with mice.
Cinderella At last I have nearly finished all this work. Maybe I’ll be able to sneak out and have a walk (Stretching) I haven’t had a break since 5 this morning and I’d love some fresh air.
Mother (off stage) There’s so much to do, where is that girl?
Exit mice, frightened.
Cinderella Oh dear here comes my stepmother and her gorgeous daughters Hyacinth and Rose. So much for a break, it’ll be more chores for Cinders as usual I’m afraid.
Enter Mother and ugly sisters
Mother Have you finished the ironing yet?
Cinderella Almost, I was just…
Mother Well hurry up, we’ve got visitors coming and the drawing room needs to be hoovered and sted.
Hyacinth And the silver polished and we’ll be wanting tea and drop scones and chocolate cake and cucumber sandwiches at 3.45 precisely.
Rose Who is coming for tea? Is it young single man with a delicious body or even an old single man or …
Hyacinth Oh Rose, not every man who enters this house is a suitor for you.
Rose Oh yes he is!
Hyacinth and others Oh no he’s not!
Rose Oh yes he is!
Hyacinthetc Oh no he’s not!
Rose Well OK maybe not every man!
Hyacinth You must behave with a bit of decorum, men like a lady who knows how to entertain. I shall show our guest that this is a house of dignity and style, Cinderella, the Wedgwood tea set of course!
Rose But Hyacinth, at my age it is not natural to be without romance. I have such yearnings! When I was with that Barry, he would buy me flowers and take me to restaurants. He complimented me and made me feel so feminine. It was so tragic that the relationship had to end.
Hyacinth Yes, a pity he found his glasses after only a week. Still don’t be down hearted dear, there are all sorts of eligible men for us both and I don’t intend to let any more slip away. I’ll do what ever it takes! (Rubs her hands together greedily)
Rose Well Mummy, who is coming for tea? Is it worth digging out that mini skirt or can I get away with the slacks?
Mother The Prince’s friend Dandini is coming to discuss some business with your father, so I had better be there to keep them right, your father is such a muddle head!
Rose Definitely the mini skirt, and maybe a boob tube.
Cinderella You don’t want to frighten him, poor man!
Hyacinth Gracious, a palatial visitor. Perhaps we’d better have the silver tea set. I must check we’ve got the quilted toilet tissue, just in case.
Cinderella Excuse me, I’ve rather a lot to do and unless you’re going to help…
Exit sisters and mother quickly making shocked/busy noises.
OK, I’ll do it all myself, as usual.
But Dandini, that is quite exciting. I wonder what Daddy will be discussing with him.
Enter Buttons with a football.
Buttons Hello Cinders (tries to kiss her but she dodges him with the ironing basket) You busy?
Cinderella No, I just felt like doing all this laundry for fun! What’s with the football?
Buttons I’ve been discovered – Your father spotted me having a kick about in the yard last week and he reckons I’ve got some talent.
Cinderella Of course you’ve got talent – ever since you scored that last minute equaliser in the match between the Red Dragon and the Brewery House…
Buttons It was great wasn’t it. Anyway, Baron Stoneybroke, your father, is going to be my personal manager. He’s having meetings with the coach of the Palace team to see if I can have a trial.
Cinderella Ah… the coach of the Palace team isn’t Dandini is it?
Buttons Yes – how did you know?
Cinderella Because he’s coming here for tea this afternoon at (imitates Hyacinth) 3.45 precisely!
Buttons Oh wow! Hey Cinders, can I serve the tea… please, please!
Cinderella I don’t know, Buttons, you know how clumsy you can be, do you think it’s such a great idea? You’ll probably drop the scones.
Buttons I thought they liked drop scones! Oh, I’ll be careful. Please.
Cinderella Oh all right, but on your head be it. Now off you go, I’ve got work to do! Where’s that flour…
Scene 2- at the palace
Jones Pray silence for their Royal Highnesses His Majesty King Rufus of Harrington and his beauteous Queen Hermione.
King (aside to servant as he enters) Have you heard the score?
Jones (whispers) Only 7-0 Your Majesty, our goalkeeper is improving!
(The King looks pleased!)
Queen Rufus, do try to enter your throne room properly. The villagers will gossip.
King We really do need to scout for some new talent.
Queen What do you care if the maidservants are ugly?
King No dear, football talent! Our Palace team is a laughing stock. We are doing well this morning as we are only 7-0 down at half time! And that is against Harrington Under 10s!
Queen Well you should discuss it with Dandini, you know. Call him now Jones.
There is another matter we need to sort out… Prince William’s marriage.
King Oh good is he marrying that singer, what’s her name British Queers?… Britley Steers?
Queen Good Heavens no, but he hasn’t actually found anyone else either and if he leaves it any longer it’ll be too late. All the nice girls will be taken. I have an idea!
King Oh no dear not another Royal Blind date! Cilla Black will refuse to do it after the last time when William refused to pick any of the girls, declaring that they were all obviously ghastly or they wouldn’t have agreed to go on such a silly program in the first place!
Queen This time it will be less public! We’ll have an enormous ball and invite all the most glamorous ladies in the land. I’ll let “Hello” magazine know and the “Times and Star” of course…
King That does sound a bit public, but it is a good idea none-the-less.
Enter Prince William in footy kit and Dandini
Dandini Hail Your Majesty! (Bows low before the King)
William Hello Mum, Dad… Urm Hail (nods and kind of waves)
King Well what was the final score?
Dandini Not too bad actually, we played much better in the second half!
King What was the score?
Dandini Oh numbers don’t mean a thing. The game was taught and they kept on running for at least … 15 minutes.
William If only we had some more young blood in the team. George Bowness and the lads from the Tuesday working party are very skillful with a ball, but the Under 10s were running through their legs!
King Dandini, tell me the score!
Dandini 15-0, your Majesty.
King 15 – 0! Oh dear it’s so embarrassing. Beaten by a bunch of kids, whatever next? Listen Dandini, there’s a match on Friday, against the Scouts. This is your last chance. I’m not a violent man, but we win that match or you’ll be …(gestures a knife stabbing Dandini repeatedly)
Dandini OK! OK, I get the picture. Leave it to me your Majesty.
Queen William, my dear, we’ve arranged a real treat for you. A little party on Friday night, well an enormous ball actually. We’ll invite all the most beautiful girls in the land and you only have to choose one.
William Only one, huh.
Dandini At least you know they won’t turn you down.
William They’re not allowed to. What chance have I got of finding one who actually likes me?
King They don’t have to like you, they just have to live with you. Poor girl, whoever she is she will have her hands full.
Scene 3 - In a sports shop
Cinderella is selecting football boots with salesman.
Cinderella I’m not saying money is no object, but I do want to get good ones.
Salesman Well these ones are the best at £150. And they have the designer label. But these ones are good too at £15.99, but they don’t have a designer label.
Cinderella Well what is the difference between them?
Salesman Urm… well these ones have this fantastic designer label you see.
Cinderella OK. So if I don’t care about the label are they just the same?
Salesman Oh no! Because these ones have the designer label of course!
Cinderella Right I think I understand. Thank you.
Salesman I’ll let you decide, shall I.
Enter Prince William to choose some boots
William Now which boots will improve my game? (Picks up designer boots)
Cinderella Do you know anything about these? I want to buy some for my friend Buttons who is trying out for a place on a big team. I just don’t know which ones to choose.
William (aside) She’s so beautiful! (To Cinderella) Well it depends how seriously he takes his football.
Cinderella (aside) He’s gorgeous, but he’s gone for the expensive ones so he must be a big football star. He won’t be interested in a scullery girl! (To William) Well, he lives for his football, it’s the only thing in his life!
William (aside) Obviously not the only thing – whoever this bloke Buttons is he’s got the perfect girlfriend.
(To Cinderella) He’s a lucky guy to have such a girl… er.. um.. talent!
Cinderella Well I’d better get these ones then. Thank you for your advice.
She goes to the till with the expensive boots.
William I’ve been looking for girls all this time and when I finally find the one I want she is going out with someone else.
Cinderella I’m all in a whirl, just from talking to him. I bet he plays for one of those premier teams. If only my sisters would let me watch TV, I’d probably recognise him.
Sing separately
Scene 4 – The kitchen
Enter Mother and Father
Father Now dear I have business with Mr Dandini and it really is no concern of yours.
Mother Don’t be ridiculous, Torquil, you can’t invite Palace officials to tea and not introce your wife and daughters. He would consider it most rude.
Father Well, I suppose it wouldn’t harm to introce you briefly.
Mother That’s right Darling. (To off stage) Girls, tea will be in the drawing room.
Enter ugly sisters
Hyacinth Well I should think so too. Imagine entertaining Mr Dandini in the kitchen.
Rose What about the decorators Mummy? That Laurence Llewellyn Bowen is still working on the Drawing Room.
Mother What? He’s been in there for three weeks.
Rose Yes, (rubbing her hands) I’m still working on him.
Hyacinth It’ll have to be Parlour then.
father Oh no my train set is laid out in there.
Mother You’ll be laid out in a minute. Laid out flat.
Rose We could use the Conservatory.
Mother Oh dear I’ve been flower arranging in there and there are petals everywhere. Well short of serving tea in the bedroom, we’d better tell Cinders to tidy the kitchen.
Father My dearest Cinderella always keeps the kitchen tidy. Anyway she’s gone out. She said Buttons would be serving tea this afternoon.
Hyacinth Tea in the kitchen!
Rose Buttons serving! This is humiliating!
Hyacinth I was so looking forward to it.
Rose I have a headache
Hyacinth I have indigestion.
Both We’re going to bed!
Exit ugly sisters sobbing.
Enter Buttons with Dandini
Father Mr Dandini, I’m so pleased to welcome you to my beautiful, er um humble home. Please sit down. May I present my wife Clarissa.
Mother I’m sorry to say that my two daughters are ill disposed, or well just ill actually, and won’t be able to join us.
Buttons Thank goodness. A blessing Sir I assure you.
Dandini I’m sorry to hear that, but this is not a social call, I’m here on business. I believe you have a proposal for me.
Father Indeed I have Sir. I have discovered a talent for football.
Dandini Right, we have quite a lot of players of your ..er.. generation Sir. I was really looking for someone younger.
Buttons (laughing) Not him, oh no, that’s funny. He can’t kick a ball!
Father What my young protégé is trying to say, is that I am not speaking of my own talent but of his.
Dandini Who you?
Buttons has got a ball and is showing off
Buttons Yessir. I play non-stop and could score past fifty David Seamans, just give me a chance to show you.
Dandini Careful, oh you’ve squashed my hat!
Father I would be prepared to let you have him for five big ones!
Dandini Five pounds you say, well we could perhaps give him a trial.
Father Five thousand pounds I mean.
Buttons squeals and spills the tea he was pouring, all over Dandini.
Dandini Ow - what are trying to do? Five thousand pounds, are you mad?
Mother Here let me just wipe that off.
Dandini escapes as they all fuss after him.
Father That didn’t go as well as I’d hoped.
Mother I should think not!
Buttons What were you thinking - £5000?
Father What about you, pouring tea over him?
Buttons Well that’s my career over.
Father You’re right about that, you can pack your bags and leave this house tomorrow. Idiot.
And that’s our holiday plans ruined.
Mother You mean we needed that money for our trip to St Tropez.
Father Of course, your daughters dresses have cleaned us out, we haven’t a penny to spare.
Scene5 – At a bus stop
Buttons This is my last chance now that I’ve ruined things with Dandini.
Cinderella Oh Buttons, do you have to go all the way to Manchester?
Buttons Your father has fired me so I have nothing to keep me here!
Cinderella Nothing? Buttons your friendship means everything to me, and I shall miss you so much.
Buttons Cinderella, If there is more than friendship between us, I’ll stay here. Just say the word… you know I’d give up any old football for your love.
Cinderella Oh Buttons, you’re like a brother to me, but I can’t make myself feel what I don’t and your trial for Manchester United is so important. I know it’s not Harrington Palace, but it’s the next best thing! I got you these. (She gives him the football boots)
Buttons Cinders these are great, how did you know? These are the best!
Cinderella Oh someone helped me.
Buttons Someone special?
Cinderella Well, he was kind of amazing I have to admit, but I’ll probably never see him again so…
Buttons I hope he’s good enough for you, if anyone ever hurt you I’d…
Cinderella I know, I know…but not everyone has such exalted feelings about me, you know. Anyway, you’ll miss your bus.
Buttons Then it’s goodbye. Can I have a hug?
Enter Prince
Cinderella hugs Buttons and kisses his cheek.
Cinderella Take care, and come back soon my dear.
Prince It’s her, and this must be Buttons. They’re obviously in love. Oh well, I’ll just have to try my luck at the ball.
Exit Buttons
Cinderella notices the Prince and wipes her eyes.
Cinderella Oh hello again.
William Hello, I suppose that was Buttons.
Cinderella Yes, but he’s leaving for Manchester. I’ll miss him so much.
William Leaving? How could he leave you? You poor child, you need a shoulder to cry on, come here. There, there, don’t cry.
He puts his arms round her. Both are smiling but without the other seeing.
William I don’t even know your name.
Cinderella I’m Cinderella.
William I’m William, I live just outside town at the pa… by the woods.
Cinderella How lovely, I like to walk there and see the Palace. Have you ever met any of the royal family? I saw the Queen on a walk about once.
William Oh I see them around occasionally.
Mother’s voice off stage
Mother Cinderella, where are you girl? Come here at once.
Cinderella Oh I have to go, excuse me William.
Exit Cinderella
William See you soon Cinderella. I hope.
Scene 6 – At a football pitch
Dandini enters followed by 4 players in mismatched football strip
Dandini Right you lot, we’ve an important match on Friday and we have some training to get in. Let me see you in pairs dribbling round these cones. No I mean dribbling the ball!
They bump into each other and the balls get mixed up.
No.1 pass the ball to No. 2, no, not into the bushes. No 3 , can you watch where you’re going, careful, oh no.
They fall in a heap.
No 1 That was better than last week.
No 2 Yes, we are showing improvement.
No 3 Is it time for a break yet?
Dandini No no no! No breaks until you can do it right! Start again.
No 1 Did you see Brookside last night?
Dandini This is not a time for chatter! You should be so out of breath you can’t talk!
No 2 No, I missed it, I was taking Dolores to the Bingo.
No 4 My missus loves bingo, wouldn’t miss it. I have to take her down so I stay on to keep her company.
No 3 It’s grand for the ladies isn’t it. Mind you, I won a tenner last week.
No 2 That’s nothing, I won a hundred in May, Legs Eleven is my lucky number.
By now they are just standing chatting, Dandini is looking at his fixtures book.
Dandini What is going on? This is supposed to be a training session, not a bingo anonymous meeting.
No 1 Oh calm down Dandy, we’ll be fine on Friday.
Dandini Fine? Like you were fine last week, or the week before that? And don’t call me Dandy! Oh no here comes trouble.
Enter 2 scouts
Scout 1 Hi you lot, are you training for the match?
Scout 2 We were out last night. We ran 8 miles and put in 2 hours of skill work.
Dandini 8 miles? This lot haven’t even walked 8 miles between them in the last year.
Scout 1 Well I’m sure what you lack in fitness you make up for in experience.
The scouts start to dribble the balls round the players, who huddle up as though they were prisoners.
Scout 2 Yeah, our team are trembling in case your experience scores a goal.
Scout 1 We’ve some experience of our own, we are unbeaten this season you know after 10 games.
More Scouts join them and kneel along the front of the stage to sing “We’re riding along on the crest of a wave”
Player 1 Hey is this a pantomime or a gang show? We can sing too you know, (aside)it’s just football we have problems with. Why don’t we try out this Harrington song. You’ll find it on the back of the programmes? (To audience) You can join in if you know the tune.
All sing Harrington song.
Scout 1 OK. We’ll see who can sing the best. We’ll take this side and you can have that lot. We’ll go first.
Right side sing.
Scout 1 That was fantastic. (Throws sweets to right side.)
Player 1 Now it’s our turn.
Left side sing.
Player 1
7. heylads怎么读
hey
英 [heɪ] 美 [he]
lads
英 [lædz] 美 [lædz]