英語幽默故事類閱讀
1. 英語幽默小故事有哪些
He Won
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他贏了
湯姆：約翰尼，你小弟弟好嗎？
約翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了傷。
湯姆：真糟糕，怎麼回事兒？
約翰尼：我們做游戲，看誰能把身子探出窗外最遠，他贏了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流著血回到家裡。他媽媽問，「發生了什麼事？」
「一個男孩咬了我一口，」伊凡說。
「再見到他你能認出來嗎？」媽媽問。
「他走到哪裡我都能認出他，」伊凡說。「他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。」
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
「昨天給你的錢干什麼了？」
「我給了一個可憐的老太婆，」他回答說。 「你真是個好孩子，」媽媽驕傲地說。「再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢？」
「她是個賣糖果的。」
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父親與小兒子一道回家。這個孩子正處於那種對什麼事都很感興趣的年齡，老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發問道：「爸爸，『醉』字是什麼意思？」 「唔，孩子，」父親回答說，「你瞧那兒站著兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個，那麼我就算醉了。」 「可是，爸爸， 」孩子說，「那兒只有一個警察呀！」
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由於客人在吃蘋果餡餅時，家裡沒有乳酪了，於是女主人向大家表示歉意。這家的小男孩悄悄地離開了屋子。過了一會兒，他拿著一片乳酪回到房間，把乳酪放在客人的盤子里。 客人微笑著把乳酪放進嘴裡說：「孩子，你的眼睛就是比你媽媽的好。你在哪裡找到的乳酪？」 「在捕鼠夾上，先生。」那小男孩說。
英語小笑話
上個星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一個老美看到就笑我說, "Do you
know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著
性, 縮寫正好是 Adidas) " 我正驚訝他怎麼反應這么快, 聯想力這么豐富時,旁邊的
一個老美幫我解圍, 他說, 有一個很著名的合唱團 Korn, 他們的招牌歌之一就是
A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,這個典故可是很多老美都耳熟
能詳的喔! 下次就換你去取笑老美了.
A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second"
一男子進入教堂和上帝對話.他問:"主啊, 一百萬美元對你意味著多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又問:"且話僂蚰昴?"上帝說:"一秒鍾."最後男子請求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士嗎?"上帝回答:"過一秒鍾."
2. 英語幽默故事
Peter
dozed
off
while
his
teacher
was
talking.
老師正在講課，彼得打起瞌睡來了。
Teacher:
Peter！Tell
us,
what's
the
biggest
in
the
world?
老師：彼得！你說說，世界上什麼最大？
Peter:
Well,
well....eyelids....
彼得:
嗯……嗯……眼皮……
Teacher:
What？Eyelids？
老師：什麼？眼皮？
Peter:
Yes,
sir.
Because
as
soon
as
I
shut
my
eyes,
the
eyelids
cover
everything
of
the
world.
彼得：是的，老師。因為我眼睛一閉，眼皮就把世界上所有的東西都遮住了
Late
one
night
at
the
insane
asylum
(瘋人院）one
inmate
shouted,
"I
am
Napoleon!"
Another
one
said,
"How
do
you
know?"
The
first
inmate
said,
"God
told
me!"
Just
then,
a
voice
from
another
room
shouted,
"I
did
not!"
瘋人院
一天晚上，在瘋人院里，一個病人說："我是拿破崙！"另一個說："你怎麼知道？"第一個人說："上帝對我說的！"一會兒，一個聲音從另一個房間傳來："我沒說！"
3. 非常簡短的英語幽默故事
來源：網路知道
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Big Head
「 the kids make fun of me」the boy cried to his mother.「They say I have a big head」
「Don't listen to them.」his mother comforted him.「You have a beautiful head .Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes」
「Where's the shopping bag?」
「I haven't got one,use your hat.」
大腦袋
「所有的孩子都拿我開玩笑，」小男孩哭著跟媽媽說：「他們說我長了一個大腦袋。」
「別聽他們的，」他媽媽安慰說：「你的腦袋長得很漂亮。好了，別哭了，去商店買10磅土豆來。」
「購物袋在哪？」
「我沒有購物袋，就用你的帽子吧。」
Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
「昨天給你的錢干什麼了？」
「我給了一個可憐的老太婆，」他回答說。 「你真是個好孩子，」媽媽驕傲地說。「再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢？」
「她是個賣糖果的。」
Where is the father?
Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.
"Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"
"Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?"
The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures."
父親在哪兒？
兄弟倆在看一些漂亮的油畫。
「看，」哥哥說，「這些畫多漂亮呀！」
「是啊，」弟弟說道，「可是在所有這些畫中，只有媽媽和孩子。那爸爸去哪兒了呢？」
哥哥想了會兒，然後解釋道：「很明顯，他當時正在畫這些畫唄。」
4. 英語幽默故事帶翻譯
這樣可以嗎 ？
Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
老師:為什麼你每天早晨都遲到?
湯姆:每當我經過學校的拐角處,就看見一個牌子上寫著"學校----慢行".
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
「昨天給你的錢干什麼了？」
「我給了一個可憐的老太婆，」他回答說。 「你真是個好孩子，」媽媽驕傲地說。「再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢？」
「她是個賣糖果的。」
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父親與小兒子一道回家。這個孩子正處於那種對什麼事都很感興趣的年齡，老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發問道：「爸爸，『醉』字是什麼意思？」 「唔，孩子，」父親回答說，「你瞧那兒站著兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個，那麼我就算醉了。」 「可是，爸爸， 」孩子說，「那兒只有一個警察呀！」
5. 英語幽默故事
One
day
little
Tom
didn`t
want
to
go
to
school.
He
pretended
to
be
his
father
and
telephoned
the
teacher,"Hello,is
that
the
teacher
speaking?My
Tom
caught
a
cold
today
and
he
can`t
go
to
school.
He
ask
you
for
a
day`s
leave."
The
teacher
at
the
other
end
of
the
telephone
asked,"Who
is
that
speaking?"
"It`s
my
father,sir,"
answered
Tom.
一天，湯姆不想去上學，就裝成爸爸的聲調給老師打電話。他說:"喂，我的小湯姆今專天屬感冒了，不能去上學，他讓我向你請一天的假。」
老師問道：「你是誰？」
湯姆回答：「是我爸爸，先生。」
6. 英語幽默小故事50字左右（帶翻譯）
Q: Why won』t the elephant use the computer?
為什麼大象不玩電腦？
A: He』s afraid of the mouse!
他害怕老鼠！
滑鼠和老鼠的英文皆為mouse。
mouse [maʊs]n. 滑鼠；老鼠；膽小羞怯的人
2.A much worried patiant walked into the doctor's office and asked for help。
"Doctor, I don't know what to do. I accidentally drank a bottle of gasoline yesterday."
"Oh, don't worry! All you have to remember is not to smoke in the next few days." The doctor said.
一位很焦急的病人走到醫生辦公室尋求幫助。
「醫生，我不知道該怎麼辦。昨天我不小心喝下了一瓶汽油。」
「哦，不用擔心。你一定要牢記未來幾天不要吸煙就行了。」醫生說。
3.A man was hit by a cab in the street.
He was brought to the hospital.
His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill."
"I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor,
Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive."
"Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"
一個男人在街上被計程車撞倒送進了醫院.
他的妻子站在他的床前對醫生說:"我想他傷得很厲害."
醫生說:"我怕他已經死了."
聽到醫生的話,這個男人轉動著頭說:"我沒死,我還活著."
妻子說:"安靜,醫生比你懂得多."
4.A man goes to church and starts talking to God.
He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?"
And God says: "A penny".
Then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?"
And God says: "a second",
Then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?"
And God says "In a second".
一男子進入教堂和上帝對話.
他問:"主啊, 一百萬美元對你意味著多少?"
上帝回答:"一便士."
男子又問:"那一百萬年呢?"
上帝說:"一秒鍾."
最後男子請求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士嗎?"
上帝回答:"過一秒鍾."
5.Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny?
Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
湯姆：約翰尼，你小弟弟好嗎？
約翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了傷。
湯姆：真糟糕，怎麼回事兒？
約翰尼：我們做游戲，看誰能把身子探出窗外最遠，他贏了。
6.Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流著血回到家裡。他媽媽問，「發生了什麼事？」
「一個男孩咬了我一口，」伊凡說。
「再見到他你能認出來嗎？」媽媽問。
「他走到哪裡我都能認出他，」伊凡說。「他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。」
7. 英語幽默故事短文，急用！！！
Sleeping Pills
Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.
Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."
"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"
安眠葯
鮑勃晚上失眠。他去看醫生，醫生給他開了一些強力安眠葯。
星期天晚上鮑勃吃了葯，睡得很好，在鬧鍾響之前就醒了過來。他到了辦公室，遛達進去，對老闆說：「我今天早上起床一點麻煩都沒有。」
「好啊!」老闆吼道，「那你星期一和星期二到哪兒去了？」
Big Head
「All the kids make fun of me」the boy cried to his mother.「They say I have a big head」
「Don't listen to them.」his mother comforted him.「You have a beautiful head .Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes」
「Where's the shopping bag?」
「I haven't got one,use your hat.」
大腦袋
「所有的孩子都拿我開玩笑，」小男孩哭著跟媽媽說：「他們說我長了一個大腦袋。」
「別聽他們的，」他媽媽安慰說：「你的腦袋長得很漂亮。好了，別哭了，去商店買10磅土豆來。」
「購物袋在哪？」
「我沒有購物袋，就用你的帽子吧。」
Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
「昨天給你的錢干什麼了？」
「我給了一個可憐的老太婆，」他回答說。 「你真是個好孩子，」媽媽驕傲地說。「再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢？」
「她是個賣糖果的。」
8. 求英語幽默故事
Three Little Pigs 三隻小豬
Storyteller: There are three little pigs living with 講故事者：三隻小豬和他們的媽媽
their mother. Ding-Ding and Dong- 住在一起。丁丁和東東
Dong are brother pigs. They are very 是豬哥哥，他們很懶，他
Lazy. They eat and sleep all day. 們整天吃了就睡。龍龍是
Long-Long is the youngest pig. She 最小的，她整天幫著媽媽
works all day. She helps her mother 做家務。
to do the housework.
Mother pig: You have grown up. You must make 豬媽媽：你們已經長大了，你們得
your own houses. 為自己蓋間房。
Goodbye, little pigs. Build a house. 再見，孩子們。去蓋間房。
Be careful of the wolf. 小心狼。
Pigs: Yes, Mum. Goodbye. 三隻小豬：好的，媽媽。再見。
Wolf: I』m hungry. Look! Three little pigs 狼：我餓了。看，三隻小豬可
for dinner. Mmm. 以做我的美餐。
Sister pig: What are you doing, brothers? 豬妹妹：哥哥，你們在干什麼？
Ding-Ding: I』m building a house with leaves. 丁丁：我在用樹葉蓋房子。
Dong-Dong: I』m building a house with sticks. 東東：我在用樹枝蓋房子。
Sister pig: But leaves aren』t strong. 豬妹妹：可是樹葉不牢固。樹枝也不
And sticks aren』t strong. 牢固。
Brother pigs: Yes, we know. But it』s easy. 豬哥哥：我們知道。但它很容易。
What are you doing, sister? 你在干什麼？
Sister pig: I』m building a house with bricks. 豬妹妹：我在用磚頭蓋房子。
Brother pigs: Bricks! That』s very difficult. 豬哥哥：用磚頭蓋，那太難了。
Sister pig: I know. But bricks are strong. 豬妹妹：我知道，可是磚頭很堅固。
……
Brother pigs: Oh, we』re finished. Let』s have 豬哥哥：噢，我們蓋好了。我們打
a nap. 個盹吧。
Sister pig: My house is finished. My house 豬妹妹：我的房子蓋好了，我的房
is strong. 很堅固。
Wolf: Little pigs. Little pigs. Open your 狼： 小豬，小豬，快開門！
Doors!
Brother pigs: No. No. Go away. 豬哥哥：不開，不開。快走開。
Wolf: This is very easy. Sticks and leaves 狼：這太容易了。樹枝和樹葉
aren』t strong. 都不牢固。
Storyteller: The wolf blows the houses down. 講故事者：狼吹倒了房屋。丁丁和東
Ding-Ding and Dong-Dong run 東跑到龍龍家。
to Long-Long』s house.
Brother pigs: Help! Help! 豬哥哥：救命! 救命!
Wolf: Stop, you two pigs. 狼： 站住，你這兩只小豬。
Brother pigs: Open the door, sister. The wolf 豬哥哥：妹妹，快開門。狼來了，
is coming. Let me in. 讓我們進去。
Long-Long: Come in, please. Don』t worry. 龍龍：快進來。別擔心，我的
My house is strong. 房子很堅固。
Wolf: Where did they go? Oh they are 狼：他們跑哪兒了？噢，他們
Here. Little pigs. Little pigs. Open 在這兒。小豬，快把門打
the door! 開。
Three pigs: No. No. Go away. You bad wolf. 三隻小豬：不開，不開。快走開。
你這只惡狼。
Wolf: I』ll blow it down. 狼：我要吹倒它。
Storyteller: The wolf blows and blows. He 講故事者：狼吹呀吹，它不停地吹。
blows and blows. But the house 可是房子非常堅固。
is very strong.
Wolf: I』ll hit it. Oh. 狼：我要撞倒它。噢！
Long-Long: Let』s boil the water. 龍龍：我們把水燒開。
Brother pigs: OK. 豬哥哥：好的。
Wolf: Oh, oh! It』s hot. It』s hot. 狼：噢！噢！好燙，好燙。
Three pigs: Hooray! The wolf is dead. The 三隻小豬：好啊！狼死了，狼死了。
wolf is dead
Storyteller: Since then, Ding-Ding and Dong- 講故事者：從那以後，丁丁、東東
Dong work hard with Long-Long. 和龍龍一起努力工作。
They work and play together. 他們一起工作，一起玩。
這個短劇場景可以自己按情況更改，人可多可少，最好幽默一點的同學表演。
Napolan and his soldiers（拿破崙這個單詞我記不清楚了）
眾士兵排列整齊的上。
M: Attention.（立正） Turn right/left. Quick time, march!（齊步走） (吹哨)
Halt!(立定) Turn right/left. At ease!(稍息).Dismiss!(解散)
（在宿舍里）
Ss: Cheer!(乾杯)
（班長帶著一新士兵推門進來）
M: Hello!Everyone! This is Sam. He is Swede. Today he join us. Let's give
him a warm welcome!
Ss: Welcome! Welcome! (握手、拍肩 和他打招呼，但是他搖搖頭)
M: He doesn't know French at all.
Ss: What a pity!
本文來自: 優習網(www.YouTheme.cn) 詳細出處參考：http://www.youtheme.cn/shenghuochangshi/yingyuxiaogushi/2008-05-05/110275.html
Three Little Pigs 三隻小豬
Storyteller: There are three little pigs living with 講故事者：三隻小豬和他們的媽媽
their mother. Ding-Ding and Dong- 住在一起。丁丁和東東
Dong are brother pigs. They are very 是豬哥哥，他們很懶，他
Lazy. They eat and sleep all day. 們整天吃了就睡。龍龍是
Long-Long is the youngest pig. She 最小的，她整天幫著媽媽
works all day. She helps her mother 做家務。
to do the housework.
Mother pig: You have grown up. You must make 豬媽媽：你們已經長大了，你們得
your own houses. 為自己蓋間房。
Goodbye, little pigs. Build a house. 再見，孩子們。去蓋間房。
Be careful of the wolf. 小心狼。
Pigs: Yes, Mum. Goodbye. 三隻小豬：好的，媽媽。再見。
Wolf: I』m hungry. Look! Three little pigs 狼：我餓了。看，三隻小豬可
for dinner. Mmm. 以做我的美餐。
Sister pig: What are you doing, brothers? 豬妹妹：哥哥，你們在干什麼？
Ding-Ding: I』m building a house with leaves. 丁丁：我在用樹葉蓋房子。
Dong-Dong: I』m building a house with sticks. 東東：我在用樹枝蓋房子。
Sister pig: But leaves aren』t strong. 豬妹妹：可是樹葉不牢固。樹枝也不
And sticks aren』t strong. 牢固。
Brother pigs: Yes, we know. But it』s easy. 豬哥哥：我們知道。但它很容易。
What are you doing, sister? 你在干什麼？
Sister pig: I』m building a house with bricks. 豬妹妹：我在用磚頭蓋房子。
Brother pigs: Bricks! That』s very difficult. 豬哥哥：用磚頭蓋，那太難了。
Sister pig: I know. But bricks are strong. 豬妹妹：我知道，可是磚頭很堅固。
……
Brother pigs: Oh, we』re finished. Let』s have 豬哥哥：噢，我們蓋好了。我們打
a nap. 個盹吧。
Sister pig: My house is finished. My house 豬妹妹：我的房子蓋好了，我的房
is strong. 很堅固。
Wolf: Little pigs. Little pigs. Open your 狼： 小豬，小豬，快開門！
Doors!
Brother pigs: No. No. Go away. 豬哥哥：不開，不開。快走開。
Wolf: This is very easy. Sticks and leaves 狼：這太容易了。樹枝和樹葉
aren』t strong. 都不牢固。
Storyteller: The wolf blows the houses down. 講故事者：狼吹倒了房屋。丁丁和東
Ding-Ding and Dong-Dong run 東跑到龍龍家。
to Long-Long』s house.
Brother pigs: Help! Help! 豬哥哥：救命! 救命!
Wolf: Stop, you two pigs. 狼： 站住，你這兩只小豬。
Brother pigs: Open the door, sister. The wolf 豬哥哥：妹妹，快開門。狼來了，
is coming. Let me in. 讓我們進去。
Long-Long: Come in, please. Don』t worry. 龍龍：快進來。別擔心，我的
My house is strong. 房子很堅固。
Wolf: Where did they go? Oh they are 狼：他們跑哪兒了？噢，他們
Here. Little pigs. Little pigs. Open 在這兒。小豬，快把門打
the door! 開。
Three pigs: No. No. Go away. You bad wolf. 三隻小豬：不開，不開。快走開。
你這只惡狼。
Wolf: I』ll blow it down. 狼：我要吹倒它。
Storyteller: The wolf blows and blows. He 講故事者：狼吹呀吹，它不停地吹。
blows and blows. But the house 可是房子非常堅固。
is very strong.
Wolf: I』ll hit it. Oh. 狼：我要撞倒它。噢！
Long-Long: Let』s boil the water. 龍龍：我們把水燒開。
Brother pigs: OK. 豬哥哥：好的。
Wolf: Oh, oh! It』s hot. It』s hot. 狼：噢！噢！好燙，好燙。
Three pigs: Hooray! The wolf is dead. The 三隻小豬：好啊！狼死了，狼死了。
wolf is dead
Storyteller: Since then, Ding-Ding and Dong- 講故事者：從那以後，丁丁、東東
Dong work hard with Long-Long. 和龍龍一起努力工作。
They work and play together. 他們一起工作，一起玩。
這個短劇場景可以自己按情況更改，人可多可少，最好幽默一點的同學表演。
Napolan and his soldiers（拿破崙這個單詞我記不清楚了）
眾士兵排列整齊的上。
M: Attention.（立正） Turn right/left. Quick time, march!（齊步走） (吹哨)
Halt!(立定) Turn right/left. At ease!(稍息).Dismiss!(解散)
（在宿舍里）
Ss: Cheer!(乾杯)
（班長帶著一新士兵推門進來）
M: Hello!Everyone! This is Sam. He is Swede. Today he join us. Let's give
him a warm welcome!
Ss: Welcome! Welcome! (握手、拍肩 和他打招呼，但是他搖搖頭)
M: He doesn't know French at all.
Ss: What a pity!
有一天，一個士兵慌慌張張的跑了過來。
A. Monitor! Monitor!
M: What's the matter with you?
A: I hear Napolan will be here in a month.
M: What shall we do?
B. I hear N often asks three quenstions. and often in an order. The first
one is "How old are you?". The second one is "How long have you been in
the Amry?". The third one is "Did you join any of my two compaigns?"
M: All of us have no problem except Sam. He doesn't know French. What
shall we do?
B. I have an idea. From now on all of us teach him the three questions at
any time.
Ss: Good!
各種場合：
睡覺: A: Sam. How old are you?
Sam:21.sir!
A: How long have you been in the Army?
Sam: 3 years sir!
A: Did you join any of my two compaigns?
Sam: Both.sir!
吃飯:B:Sam. How old are you?
Sam:21.sir!
B: How long have you been in the Army?
Sam: 3 years sir!
B: Did you join any of my two compaigns?
Sam: Both.sir!
跑步：C:Sam. How old are you?
Sam:21.sir!
C: How long have you been in the Army?
Sam: 3 years sir!
C: Did you join any of my two compaigns?
Sam: Both.sir!
.....
Ss: We believe that's no problem at all.
A:(慌慌張張的) N is coming. N is coming.
(眾士兵立正)
N: Hello! Everyone. How are you?
Ss: Fine. Thank you!sir!
Sam 在哆嗦，引起了拿破崙的注意。
N: （走到他的面前）Well. How long have you been in the Army?
Sam: 21 . sir.
N: (非常吃驚的) How old are you?
Sam: (非常自信的) 3 .sir.
N: (生氣的) Either you or I am mad!!!!
Sam:(洋洋得意的)Both. sir!!!
Ss: My god!!!
眾士兵失望的下場了。