幽默的英語閱讀初二
『壹』 經典幽默英語笑話8篇
下面是我整理的經典幽默 英語笑話 ，歡迎大家閱讀!
經典幽默英語笑話：The New Baby
Mr.and Mrs.Taylor had a seven year old boy named Pat.Now Mrs.Taylor was expecting another child.
Pat had seen babies in other people's houses and had not liked them very much，so he was not delighted about the news that there was soon going to be one in his house too.
One evening Mr.and Mrs.Taylor were making plans for the baby's arrival.This house won't be big enough for us all when the baby comes，said Mr.Taylor.
Pat came into the room just then and said，What are you talking about?We were saying that we'll have to move to an other house now，because the new baby's coming，his mother answered.
It's no use，said Pat hopelessly. He'll follow us there.
新生兒
泰勒夫婦有一個七歲的男孩，名叫帕特。現在泰勒太太正懷著第二胎。
帕特在別人家看見過嬰兒，他不太喜歡他們，所以他對自己家裡也將有一個嬰兒的消息感到不滿。
一天晚上，泰勒夫婦正在為這個嬰兒的降生計劃做安排。泰勒先生說：有了嬰兒，我們的房子就太小，不夠住了。
帕特恰好在這個時候走進屋，他問：你們在說什麼?他的母親回答說：我們在說我們現在得搬家，因為嬰兒就要誕生了。
那沒用，帕特絕望地說。他會跟我們到那兒去的。
經典幽默英語笑話：What Are The Two Words?
A very nice old lady had a few words to say to her granddaughter.My dear， said the old lady，I wish you would do something for me.I wish you would promise me never to use two words.One is‘lousy’and the other is‘swell’.Would you promise me that?
Why，sure，Granny，said the girl.What are the two words?
是哪兩個詞?
一個非常高貴的老夫人有幾句話要對她的孫女說。我親愛的，老夫人說：我希望你能幫我一個忙。我要你答應永遠不要用兩個詞。一個是‘討厭的’，另一個是‘極好的’。你能答應我嗎?
噢，當然，奶奶。女孩說：是哪兩個詞?
經典幽默英語笑話：What's your name?
A very strict officer was talking to some new soldiers whom he had to train.He had never seen them before,so he began:My name is Stone,and I'm even harder than stone,so do what I tell you or there'll be trouble.Don't try any tricks with me ,and then we'll get on well together
Then he went to each soldier one after another and asked him his name.Speak loudly so that everyone can hear you clearly,He said,and don't forget to call me 'sir'.
Each soldier told him his name,unitl he came to the last one.This man remained silent,and so Captain Stone shouted at him,When I ask you a question,answer it!I'll ask you again:What's you name,soldier?
The soldier was very unhappy,but at last he replied.My name is Stonebreaker,sirhe said nervously.
你叫什麼名字?
有一位很嚴厲的軍官在對一群交由他訓練的新兵訓話。他以前從沒見過這群新兵，於是他開始 自我介紹 ：我的名字叫Stone(石頭)，事實上，我甚至比石頭更強硬。這就是我為什麼要告訴你們我名字的原因。不要試圖對我玩什麼花招，這樣我們就能很好相處了。
接著他開始走到每個士兵前面問他們的名字。說大聲點，讓每個人都能聽清楚。另外，不要忘記稱呼我為長官。他說。
每個士兵都對他說了自已的名字。他走到最後一位士兵面前時，這個士兵保持著沉默。於是Stone隊長對他喊叫，當我問你問題的時候，要回答!我再問一遍，你的名字，士兵?
那個新兵很不高興，但最後他回答了。我的名字是Stonebreaker(碎石機)，長官。他緊張的說。
經典幽默英語笑話：No Problem
A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop. How can I help you? asked the stylist. I went for a hair transplant, the guy explained, but I couldn't stand the pain. If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you $5,000.
No problem, said the stylist, and he quickly shaved his head.
沒問題
一個禿頭的男人坐在理發店裡。發型師問：有什麼可以幫你嗎?那個人解釋說：我本來去做頭發移植，但實在太痛了。如果你能夠讓我的頭發看起來像你的一樣，而且沒有任何痛苦，我將付給你5000美元。
沒問題，發型師說，然後他很快幫自己剃了個光頭。
經典幽默英語笑話：
The great painter was asked, one day to paint a picture of Pharaoh crossing the Red Sea. A little while after the picture had been commenced，a hitch arose over the fee，and Hogarth found that he would have to complete the commission for about half the sum he expected. When the work was com pleted， the patron was asked to come and inspect it.As a matter of fact，the picture was just one daub of brilliant red.
What's this? exclaimed the purchaser.I asked for theRed Sea， on the occasion of the celebrated passage.
That's it，replied Hogarth.
But，where are the Israelites?
They are all gone over.
Where are the Egyptians?
They're all drowned.
一天，有人請這位偉大的畫家畫一幅法老王渡紅海圖。這幅畫剛開始不久，酬金就出現了問題。霍迪斯發現，完成這幅畫後，他只能得到他想要的大約一半的錢。當作品完成之後，那位主顧被請來看畫。其實，這幅畫不過是胡亂塗抹的一片鮮紅。
這是什麼?那位買主喊了起來。我要的是紅海，是那次著名的航海。
這就是，霍迦斯回答說。
可是以色列人在哪兒?
他們都已經渡過去了。
埃及人在哪兒?
他們全都淹死了。
經典幽默英語笑話：人們什麼時候說話最少?
Teacher: What is the plural of man,Tom?
老師: 湯姆，“男人”這個詞的復數形式是什麼?
Tom: Men.
湯姆:男人們。
Teacher: Good. And the plural of child?
老師: 答得好。那“孩子”的復數形式呢?
Tom : Twins.
湯姆: 雙胞胎。
經典幽默英語笑話：我丈夫剛進來
The couple seated in restaurant seemed to be having a wonderful time. But as the woman glanced away from the table，their waiter suddenly rushed over.
在飯館里坐著一對夫婦，他們看上去非常高興。但是當那女子向旁邊瞥了一眼時，服務員馬上跑了過來。
“Madam look,”he said.“Your husband just slid under the table.”
“夫人，您瞧,” 他說,“您丈夫滑到桌子底下去了。”
“No,he didn't,”she replied.“My husband just came in the door.”
“不，他沒有,” 她回答,“我丈夫剛從門外進來。”
經典幽默英語笑話：有兩條褲子
A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible,” she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”
丈夫下班回到家裡，發現自己的新娘心緒煩亂。“我心裡太難受了，”她說。“我在給你熨西裝時把褲子的臀部燒了個大洞。”
“Forget it ,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”
“沒事兒，”丈夫安慰她說。“你忘了我這套衣服有兩條褲子。”
“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. "And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.”
“是的，”妻子高興地說，“幸虧你還有一條，我後來就用它來補了這個洞了。”
『貳』 八下英語閱讀理解 幽默故事
Jonesie The Great Lion Hunter A *** all village was troubled by a man-eating lion. So its leaders sent a message to the great hunter, Jonesie, to e and kill the beast. For several nights the hunter lay in wait for the lion, but it never appeared. Finally, he told the village chief to kill a cow and give him its hide. Draping the skin over his shoulders, he went to the pasture to wait for the lion. In the middle of the night, the villagers woke to the sound of blood-curdling shrieks ing from the pasture. As they carefully approached, they saw the hunter on the ground, groaning in pain. There was no sign of the lion. "What happened, Jonesie? Where is the lion?" asked the chief. "Fet the damn lion!" he howled. "Which one of you idiots let the bull loose?" <p><a
『叄』 15則經典英語幽默故事
下面是我整理的15則經典英語幽默 故事 ，歡迎大家閱讀!
英語幽默故事1.
A: Madam, do you have something in common with your husband?
B: Oh, we have only one point in common—we got married on the same day, in the same month and in the same year.
英語幽默故事2.
After spending all day watching football, Harry fell asleep in front of the TV and spent the night in the chair. In the morning, his wife woke him up. “ Get up, dear,” she said, “ It’s 20 to seven.”
He awoke with a start. “ In whose favor?”
英語幽默故事3.
The miserly millionaire called a family conference, “ I’m placing a box of money in the attic,” he said.” When I die, I intend to grab it on my way up to heaven. See to it that no one touches it until it’s my time too go.”
The family respected his wishes. After his death, the millionaire’s wife looked in the attic. The box was still there. “ THE FOOL!” she said. ”I told him he should have put it in the basement.”
英語幽默故事4.
On the way home from my university, I was going to drop off a friend at her home, when I realized I was lost. I asked her for directions. She said she was not sure of the route. Hoping to jog her memory, I asked, “ what route does your father take when drives you to school?” She didn’t know. I thought it might simplify things if I rephrased the question.” When you go home, which way does he go?”
“ Oh, that’s easy,” she replied. “ He goes back the same way he came.”
英語幽默故事5.
During my second year at university I was having trouble deciding on my major. In a agonizing discussion with my adviser, I decided to double major in astrophysics and theater. Getting up to leave, I said, “ Thanks for your help. But what am I going to do once I graate?”
My adviser shrugged,“ You could be a star,” he said.
英語幽默故事6.
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest’s plate.
The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said, “ You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?”
“ In the rat trap, sir,” replied the boy.
英語幽默故事7.
One professor solemnly addressed the class the day after a big assignment had been e. “ Many of you know me,” he intoned. “And many of you have met my dog, Gus. Obviously, one of you has not.”
“ I apologize to whoever slipped a term paper under my office door,” he continued. “ My dog ate your homework.”
英語幽默故事8.
Just before graation from university, my son and several friends were discussing the role their families had played in their career plans. My son, who had been accepted by a college of optometry, had been quiet ring most of the talk.
“ How about you, Dale?” one of his buddies asked. “ Was you pushy?
“ No, he replied. “ I had complete freedom of choice. I could be any kind of doctor I wanted to be.”
英語幽默故事9.
During my first year at Naval Postgraate School, I sat chatting one day with some classmates about the program’s difficulties. A professor overheard us and tried to allay our fears. “Don’t worry too much about grades,” he explained. “ When you think you know everything, they give you a Bachelor’s degree. Then when you realize that you don’t know anything, they give you a Master’s, and when you find out that you don’t know anything, but neither does anyone else” he continued,” they give you a doctorate.”
英語幽默故事10.
Recently engaged, I asked my aunt, who has been married to Uncle Bob for 34 years, what she thought was the key to the success of their long union. She said, “ Try not to argue, and we respect each other’s privacy.”
At this point Uncle Bob interrupted. “ She works days and I work nights,” he said.
英語幽默故事11.
About two weeks before our fifth anniversary of marriage, my husband asked what I would like for a gift. I told him I wanted something impractical and romantic.
On our anniversary night, he presented me with a lovely gold bracelet. “ A little four-letter word made me get this for you,” he said softly.
“Oh, how sweet,” I whispered. “L-O-V-E?’
“No,’ he replied. “S-A-l-E.”
英語幽默故事12.
A: Oh, how nice your bookshelf is! But it’s a pity that it is empty without any books in it.
B: I had no bookshelf in the past. In order to buy the bookshelf, I have sold all my books. Don’t you know?
英語幽默故事13.
M: Do you love your bride?
Bridegroom: Yes, of course. I love her very much.
M: Are you willing to accompany with your husband forever?
Bride (with head shaking repeatedly): Of course not. He is a postman, how can I accompany with him all the whole day?
英語幽默故事14.
“Joe is the man for me,” said a starry-eyed young lady to her mother, “ He’s nice. He’s handsome. He’s smart. He’s hardworking. He’s strong. He’s kind…..”
“He’s married” interrupted her mother.
“ So nobody is perfect.”
英語幽默故事15.
A tobacco-company executive traveled the country looking for long-time smoker in good health. He found one man who admitted to smoking for 70 years. “ If you do a commercial for us,” the executive explained. “ We’ll pay you $10,000.”
“It’s a deal,” said the smoker. “When do I start?”
“How about 10 A.M. Tomorrow?”
“Can’t do it then, son—I never quit coughing till noon.”
『肆』 幽默類的英語短文閱讀
隨著經濟全球化的發展和國際交往的日益頻繁,語言成為人們互相交流的重要橋梁。英語教學已成為各級學校的重點教學內容。本文是幽默類的英語短文，希望對大家有幫助!
幽默類的英語短文：Be Careful What You Wish For
A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.
During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the hu *** and's turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I'd like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.
慎重許願
一對結婚25周年的夫妻在慶祝他們六十歲的生日。他們恰好在同一天出生。
慶祝活動中，一位仙女出現了。她說，由於他們是已經結婚25年的恩愛夫妻，因此她給許給這對夫妻每個人一個願望。
妻子想周遊世界。仙女招了招手。「呯!」的一聲，她的手中出現了一張票。
接下來該丈夫許願了。他猶豫片刻，害羞地說，「那我想要一位比我年輕30歲的女人。」
仙女拾起了魔術棒。「呯!」，他變成了90歲。
幽默類的英語短文：Reached Shore Fast 快速靠岸
A guy I know was towing his boat home from a fishing trip to Lake Huron when his car broke down. He didn't have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be able to raise someone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance.
He climbed into his boat, clicked on the radio and said, "Mayday, mayday."
A Coast Guard officer came on and said, "State your location."
"I-75, two miles south of Standish."
After a very long pause, the officer asked, "How fast were you going when you reached shore?"
在休倫湖釣完魚後，我的一個朋友開車拖著他的船回家。路上車壞了。他沒帶手機，不過，他想，也許他可以通過海事無線廣播來請求公路援助。
於是，他爬到他的船裡面，啟動了無線裝置，喊道，「求救，求救」。
一名海岸護衛隊警官作出了回應，「報告你的位置」。
「I-75號公路，Standish的南面兩英里」。
沉默了好一會之後，警官問我的朋友，「你的船靠岸時開得有多快?」
幽默類的英語短文：Friend for Dinner
Honey, said the hu *** and to his wife, I invited a friend home for supper.
What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I havent been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I dont feel like cooking a fancy meal!
I know all that.
Then why did you invite a friend for supper?
Because the poor fools thinking about getting married.
請朋友吃飯
「親愛的，」丈夫對妻子說：「我邀請了一位朋友回家吃晚飯。」
「什麼?你瘋了嗎?我們的房子亂糟糟的，我很久沒有買過東西回來了，所有的碗碟都是臟的，還有，我可不想做一餐累死人的晚飯。」
「這些我全都知道。」
「那你為什麼還要邀請朋友回來吃晚飯?」
「因為那個可憐的笨蛋正考慮要結婚呢。」
幽默類的英語短文：A Peddler of Selling Earthen Basins ***賣瓦盆的小販***
A peddler sold earthen basins in the wayside, he chanted as knocked :"Earthen basin is round, beautiful and solid, judging by the sound, they are all good." At the time of his knocking, that earthen basin was broken into pieces with a crack***爆裂聲*** . Lookers-on burst into the roars of laughter. He threw the fragments***碎片，殘片*** without extra trouble into paddy***稻穀，稻田*** field, but an experienced peasant from the crowd did not let him off***放過，不懲罰*** easily:" How the deuce ***強式特指問句*** can you throw them into my field? They』ll impede ***妨礙***my growing crops!" The peddler who sold earthen basins tried to explain it away promptly:" Nothing, the fragments will be converted into powder as soon as they absorbed water ."
一個小販在路邊賣瓦盆，他一邊敲一邊唱：「瓦盆圓又圓，結實又好看，光聽這聲音，就知不一般。」敲著敲著，「啪啦」一聲，把盆敲爛了。圍觀的人一陣鬨笑。他順手把碎片扔進了稻田裡，誰知人群中一個老農不幹了：「你怎麼能往我地里扔?這不影響我種田嗎?」 賣瓦盆的小販連忙辯解：「不要緊，瓦片見水一會兒就粉了。」
『伍』 英語小幽默故事50字
① 少於50字的搞笑英語小短文「帶翻譯」
1、Text(正文):The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled . His father knew it, but hisgrandma doted on him. He hardly left her side.
And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum. Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.
When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door.
"Was school all right?" she asked, "Did you get along all right? did you cry?"
"Cry?" John asked. "No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!"
六歲的約翰嬌生慣養。他的父親知道這一點，可他的祖父母仍然寵著他。這孩子幾乎寸步不離他的祖母。他想要什麼不是哭，就是鬧。他第一天上學才離開祖母的懷抱。
約翰放學了，他奶奶在門口接他並問道：「學校怎麼樣？你過的好嗎？哭了沒有？」
「哭？」約翰問，「不，我沒哭，可老師哭了。」
2、Text(正文):The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."
"Why use my elbow and foot?"
"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not ing empty-hangded, are you?"
一個出了名的吝嗇鬼終於決定要請一次客了大沒。他在向一個朋友解釋怎麼找到他家時說：「你上到五樓，找中間那個門，然後用你的胳膊肘按門鈴。門開了之後，再用你的腳把門推開。」
「為什麼要用我的肘和腳呢？」
「你的雙手得拿禮物啊。天哪，你總不會空著手來吧？」吝嗇鬼回答。
3、Text(正文):One evening I drove my hu *** and's car to the shopping mall.On my return, I noticed that how sty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit.
When I finally entered the house, I called out."The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."
My hu *** and looked up and said, "Mom's here?"
一滾喊納天晚上我開著丈夫的車滲隱去購物，回來後發現車身沾滿灰塵，於是擦洗了一陣。當我終於走進屋裡時大聲喊：「世界上最愛你的女人剛擦洗了你的車燈和擋風玻璃。」我丈夫抬頭看了看，說：「媽媽來了？
4、Text(正文):"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me."
He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants recing by nearly fifty pounds.
Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I'm an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."
「醫生」她沖進屋後大聲說道。
「我想讓你坦率地說我到底得了什麼病。」
他從頭到腳打量打量她，然後大聲說：「太太，我有三件事要對你說。第一，您的體重需要減少大約50磅；第二，如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口紅，您的美貌將會改變。第三，我是一位畫家——醫生住在樓下。」
5、Text(正文):A 747 was halfway across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker, "Attention, passengers. We have lost one of our engines, but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately, we will arrive an hour late as a result."
Shortly thereafter, the passengers heard the captain's voice again, "Guess what, folks. We just lost our third engine, but please be assured we can fly with only one. We will now arrive in London three hours late."
At this point, one passenger became furious. "For Pete's sake," he shouted, "If we lose another engine, we'll be up here all night!"
一架747客機正在跨越大西洋時，喇叭里傳來了機長的聲音：「旅客們請注意，我們的四個引擎中有一個丟失了。但剩下的三個引擎會把我們帶到倫敦的。只是我們要因此晚到一小時。」
過了一會兒，旅客們又聽到機長的聲音：「各位，你們猜怎麼啦？我們剛又掉了第三個引擎。但請你們相信好了。只有一個引擎我們也能飛，但要晚三個小時了。」 正在這時，一位乘客非常氣憤地說：「看在上帝的份上，如果我們再掉一個引擎，我們就要整夜都要呆在天上了。」
(1)英語小幽默故事50字擴展閱讀：
第一個笑話中spoil造句示例如下：
1、Others say they do not want to spoil their children by leaving them too much.
還有人表示，他們不想給子女留下太多錢，以免寵壞他們。
2、Once you pop open the cork, wines can spoil in a matter of hours.
一旦你打開軟木塞，葡萄酒就會在數小時內變質。
3、They say it only takes a few bad apples to spoil the bunch.
他們說這只需要少數的害群之馬便可毀了一堆。
4、A fond mother may spoil her child.溺愛的母親可能會寵壞她的孩子。
5、The child was spoilt by his grandfather.這個孩子被他的爺爺給慣壞了。
② 英語幽默小故事50字左右（帶翻譯）
Q: Why won』t the elephant use the puter?
為什麼大象不玩電腦？
A: He』s afraid of the mouse!
他害怕老鼠！
滑鼠和老鼠的英文皆為mouse。
mouse [maʊs]n. 滑鼠；老鼠；膽小羞怯的人
2.A much worried patiant walked into the doctor's office and asked for help。
"Doctor, I don't know what to do. I accidentally drank a bottle of gasoline yesterday."
"Oh, don't worry! All you have to remember is not to *** oke in the next few days." The doctor said.
一位很焦急的病人走到醫生辦公室尋求幫助。
「醫生，我不知道該怎麼辦。昨天我不小心喝下了一瓶汽油。」
「哦，不用擔心。你一定要牢記未來幾天不要吸煙就行了。」醫生說。
3.A man was hit by a cab in the street.
He was brought to the hospital.
His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill."
"I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor,
Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive."
"Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"
一個男人在街上被計程車撞倒送進了醫院.
他的妻子站在他的床前對醫生說:"我想他傷得很厲害."
醫生說:"我怕他已經死了."
聽到醫生的話,這個男人轉動著頭說:"我沒死,我還活著."
妻子說:"安靜,醫生比你懂得多."
4.A man goes to church and starts talking to God.
He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?"
And God says: "A penny".
Then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?"
And God says: "a second",
Then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?"
And God says "In a second".
一男子進入教堂和上帝對話.
他問:"主啊, 一百萬美元對你意味著多少?"
上帝回答:"一便士."
男子又問:"那一百萬年呢?"
上帝說:"一秒鍾."
最後男子請求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士嗎?"
上帝回答:"過一秒鍾."
5.Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny?
Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
湯姆：約翰尼，你小弟弟好嗎？
約翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了傷。
湯姆：真糟糕，怎麼回事兒？
約翰尼：我們做游戲，看誰能把身子探出窗外最遠，他贏了。
6.Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流著血回到家裡。他媽媽問，「發生了什麼事？」
「一個男孩咬了我一口，」伊凡說。
「再見到他你能認出來嗎？」媽媽問。
「他走到哪裡我都能認出他，」伊凡說。「他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。」
③ 英語小故事【簡短些，50字】
英語幽默故事簡短，內容詼諧幽默，情節生動有趣，相信在你在閱讀的同時也可以一起學習英語哦。
不知道怎麼學英語？專業外教幫助你：【//acadsoc】點擊藍字即可免費領取外教課一節。
在阿西吧，課均不到20元，外教發音標准地道，一對一因材施教，能隨時進行課程調整，為大家制定合理的學習計劃，點擊上述藍字領取免費外教試聽課。
英語小故事分享：
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. a woman is driving down the same road.
As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "pig!!"
The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "witch!!"
They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.
if only men would listen.
不知道如何選擇英語機構，可以網路咨詢「阿西吧vivi老師」；
如果想下載免費英語資源，可以網路搜索「阿西吧官網論壇」。
The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly o hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"
"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".
教進化論的老師已經滔滔不絕地講了快兩個小時，他的話題又來了：「讓我迴向進化論者提個問題——如果我答們曾經像狒狒那樣長著尾巴，那麼現在尾巴到哪裡去了？」
「我來試試看，」一位老太太說。
「該是我們在這里坐這么久把它們磨掉了吧。」
⑤ 英語小故事帶翻譯10篇50字
英語小故事—The Real Princess
小學403字
There was once a prince who wished to marry a princess; but then she must be a real princess. He travelled all over the world in hopes of finding such a lady; but there was always something wrong. Princesses he found in plenty; but whether they were real princesses it was impossible for him to decide, for now one thing, now another, seemed to him not quite right about the ladies. At last he returned to his palace quite cast down, because he wished so much to have a real Princess for his wife.
從前有一位王子，他想找一位公主結婚，但她必須是一位真正的公主。他走遍了全世界，想要尋到這樣的一位公主。可是無論他到什麼地方，他總是碰到一些障礙。公主倒有的是，不過他沒有辦法斷定她們究竟是不是真正的公主，她們好象總是有些地方不大對頭。結果，他只好回到自己的皇宮來，心中很不快活，因為他是那麼渴望著得到一位真正的公主。
One evening a fearful tempest arose, it thundered and lightened, and the rain poured down from the sky in torrents: besides, it was as dark as pitch. All at once there was heard a violent knocking at the door, and the old King, the Prince's father, went out himself to open it.
It was a princess who was standing outside the door. What with the rain and the wind, she was in a sad condition; the water trickled down from her hair, and her clothes clung to her body. She said she was a real princess.
有一天晚上，忽然起了一陣可怕的暴風雨。天空中風馳電掣，大雨傾盆而降，四周一片漆黑。就在這時，響起了一陣劇烈的敲門聲，老國王自己去開門。
站在城外的是一位公主。可是，天哪!經過了風吹雨打之後，她的樣子是多麼難看啊!水沿著她的頭發和向下面流，她的衣服粘在身上。她說她是真正的公主。
Ah! we shall soon see that! thought the old Queen-mother; however, she said not a word of what she was going to do; but went quietly into the bedroom, took all the bed-clothes off the bed, and put a little pea on the bedstead. She then laid enty mattresses one upon another over the
pea, and put enty feather beds over the mattresses.
Upon this bed the Princess was to pass the night.
是的，這點我們馬上就可以考查出來。 老皇後心裡想，可是她什麼也沒說。她靜靜地走進卧房，把所有的被褥都搬開，在床榻上放了一粒豌豆。然後她取出二十床墊子，把它們壓在豌豆上。隨後，她又在這些墊子上放了二十床鴨絨被。
這位公主夜裡就睡在這些東西上面。
The next morning she was asked how she had slept. Oh, very badly indeed! she replied. I have scarcely closed my eyes the whole night through. I do not know what was in my bed, but I had something hard under me, and am all over black and blue. It has hurt me so much!
Now it was plain that the lady must be a real Princess, since she had been able to feel the little pea through the enty mattresses and enty feather beds. None but a real Princess could have had such a delicate sense of feeling.
So the prince took her for his wife, for now he knew that he had a real princess; and the pea was put in the museum, where it may still be seen, if no one has stolen it.
豌豆公主
第二天早晨大家問她昨晚睡得怎樣。 啊，不舒服極了! 公主說， 我差不多整夜沒合上眼!天曉得我床上有件什麼東西?我睡到一塊很硬的東西上面，弄得我全身發青發紫，這真怕人!
現在大家就看出來了。她是一位真正的公主，因為壓在這二十床墊子和二十床鴨絨被下面的一粒豌豆，她居然還能感覺得出來。除了真正的公主以外，任何人都不會有這么嫩的皮膚的。
因此那位王子就選她為妻子了，因為現在他知道他得到了一位真正的公主。這粒豌豆因此也就被送進了博物館，如果沒有人把它拿走的話，人們現在還可以在那兒看到它呢。
⑥ 求英文幽默小故事 少一點 越少越好 帶中文翻譯
1 理所當然
Taken for Granted
THE SCHOOL HEALTH FORMS had been distributed to the students with an error---the word "Sex" had been spelled with an "o". One mother, filling out the form for her son, wrote in the blank next to "Sox": "Usually brown."
某學校發給學生的健康調查表裡有個錯別字——把「性別」的「性」字寫成了「襪」字。一位母親在為她的兒子填寫表格時，在「襪別」的那欄填上了：「棕色為主。」
[注] 英語 中sex（性）與sox（襪）只有一個字母之差。
2 一隻小貓
Mrs Brown went to visit one of her friend and carried a *** all box with holes punched in the top.
" What's in your box?" asked the friend.
"A cat," answered Mrs Brown. "You see I've been dreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catch them."
"But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend.
"So is the cat," whispered Mrs Brown.
布朗夫人去拜訪一位朋友，她拿著一個頂部扎滿了小眼兒的盒子。 「盒子里裝的是什麼？」朋友問道。 「一隻小貓，」 布朗夫人回答說，「你知道我晚上睡覺總夢見老鼠，我非常害怕。這只貓可以抓住那些老鼠。」 「可老鼠都是假想的呀。」朋友說。 「小貓也是假想的。」 布朗夫人小聲說道。
3 約會
When the young waitress in the café in Tom's building started waving hello everyday. Tom was flattered, for she was at least 15 years younger than he. One day she waved and beckoned to Tom again. When Tom strolled over, she asked, "Are you single?"
"Why, yes," Tom replied, *** iling at her broadly.
"So is my mom," she said. "Would you like to meet her?"
在湯姆工作的大樓里有一個咖啡屋，那兒總有一位小姐每天都和他打招呼。湯姆有些受寵若驚，因為這位小姐看上去至少比他年輕15歲。一天她又對湯姆招手並示意湯姆過去。於是湯姆走了過去。她問道，「您現在是單身嗎？」 「對，是單身，」湯姆滿臉堆笑的說。 「我母親也是，」她說，「您願不願意見見她？」
⑦ 10篇英語小故事50字
Just after class,a teacher asked to a student"Boy,why have you got cotton in your ear?Is it infected?You look very pain," "No,sir,but you just told me everything my a ear went in one ear and out.so I am trying to stop it."
「孩子,你為什麼用棉花塞住耳朵?它感染了嗎?」 「沒有,老師.可是你昨天說你告訴我的知識都是一個耳朵里進,一個耳朵里出,所以我要把它堵在裡面.」
Last week,Mrs Black went to London.She didn』t know London very well,and she lost her way.Suddenly she saw a man near a bus stop.She went up to the man and said,「Excuse me!Can you tell me the way to the hospital,please?」 The man *** iled.He didn』t know English!He came from Germany.But then he put his hand into his pocket,and took out an English dictionary.He looked up some words.Then he said slowly,「I』m sorry I can』t understand you.」
上周,布萊克夫人去了一趟倫敦.她不太熟悉倫敦,結果她迷路了.突然她在一個公共汽車站附近看見一位男子.她急忙向這位男子走去,說道：「勞駕您一下!請您告訴我去醫院的路,好嗎?」這位男子笑了.他聽不懂英語.他來自德國.但是他將手伸進了自己的衣袋裡,從裡面掏出了一本英語詞典.他查找到了一些單詞.然後他一字一句地說：「我很抱歉我聽不懂你說的話.」
It was a cold winter day in 1919.A *** all boy was walking along the street in London.His name was Tom.He was very hungry.He wanted to buy some bread,but he had no money.What could he do?When he was very young,he wanted to be a great man in the world of films.So he worked to sing and dance well.Thirty years later,the boy became one of the famous people in the world.
那是1919年的一個寒冷的冬天.一個小男孩正漫步在倫敦的街頭.他的名字叫湯姆.他餓極了.他想買一些麵包,可是他身無分文.他該怎麼辦呢?當他非常年幼的時候,他就想當一名電影世界中的偉人.所以他努力把歌唱好,把舞跳好.三十年之後,這個小男孩真地成為了電影世界中的著名人物之一.
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for o cents."What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly."Here are o cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢.
「昨天給你的錢干什麼了?」
「我給了一個可憐的老太婆,」他回答說.「你真是個好孩子,」媽媽驕傲地說.「再給你兩分錢.可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢?」
「她是個賣糖果的
『陸』 英語幽默童話故事
多閱讀一些英語童話小 故事 ,會提高孩子的 英語閱讀 能力而且對口語和詞彙量的增加也有所幫助。下面是我整理的英語幽默 童話故事 ，漢語大家閱讀。
英語幽默童話故事： I can’t Cook It
It’s sunny day in spring. Miss Cat is fishing. Suddenly the fishing rod moves. “Great! Oh, it’s so heavy!” Miss Cat says happily.
The fish is plucked out of the river. “Oh, a big fish! How big the fish is!” She cheers. But she puts the fish into the river and goes on fishing.
At the time Mr. House goes by and sees it. “What do you set it free?” He asks. “Because my pot is too small. I can’t cook it,” Miss Cat says.
我沒法煮它
這是春天裡一個陽光明媚的日子，貓小姐在河邊釣魚。突然魚竿動了動。“太棒了!哇，好重啊!”貓小姐高興地喊著。
魚被拉出來了。“啊!一條大魚!這條大魚可真大呀!”她歡呼道。但是她卻把魚放回河裡，又繼續釣魚。
這時候馬先生路過，看見這一切，就問她：“為什麼你把魚放了?” “因為我的鍋太小。我沒辦法燒這么大的魚。”貓小姐回答說。
英語幽默童話故事： Count Tomorrow Morning
It’s a right. John is looking at the sky.
Tom is John’s younger brother. He asks John “What are you doing?”
John says, “I’m counting stars.”
Tom laughs and says, “It’s really dark now. Why not count them tomorrow morning?”
明天早上數
這是一個晚上。約翰抬頭看著天空。
湯姆是約翰的弟弟。他問約翰：“你在干什麼?”
約翰說：“我在數星星。”
湯姆笑著說：“現在天空太黑了。你為什麼不等到明天早上再數呢?”
英語幽默童話故事： I Don’t Like Her
Bob goes to a new school.
One day he comes back, “Bob, do you like your new teacher?” his mother asks.
“I don’t like her, Mother. Because first she says that three and three is six, and then she says that two and four is six, too.”
我不喜歡她
鮑勃的去了所新學校。
一天， 他回到家，他媽媽問他：“你喜歡你的新老師嗎?”
“不，我不喜歡她，媽媽。因為她先說3加3等於6，然後她又說2加4等於6.”
英語幽默童話故事：Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父親與小兒子一塊兒回家。這個孩子正處於那種對什麼事都很感興趣的年齡，老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發問道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什麼意思?” “唔，孩子，”父親回答說，“你瞧那兒站著兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個，那麼我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子說，“那兒只有一個警察呀!”
英語幽默童話故事：
The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"
"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".
教進化論的老師已經滔滔不絕地講了快兩個小時，他的話題又來了：“讓我向進化論者提個問題——如果我們曾經像狒狒那樣長著尾巴，那麼現在尾巴到哪裡去了?”
“我來試試看，”一位老太太說。
“該是我們在這里坐這么久把它們磨掉了吧。”
英語幽默童話故事：
Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today?
Student: Of course. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.
一名偉人
老師：如果莎士比亞還活著，他會是一名偉人嗎?
學生：當然。因為到目前為止，還沒有人活到400多歲。
英語幽默童話故事： A Clever Panda
A little panda picks up a pumpkin and wants to take it home. But the pumpkin is too big. The panda can’t take it home.
Suddenly she sees a bear riding a bike toward her. She watches the bike. “I know! I have a good idea.” she jumps and shouts happily, “I can roll a pumpkin. It’s like a wheel.”
So she rolls the pumpkin to her home. When her mother sees the big pumpkin, she is surprised, “Oh, my God! How can you carry it home?” the little panda answers proudly, “I can’t lift it, but I can roll it.” Her mother smiled and says，“What a clever girl! Use you heard to do something,”
聰明的熊貓
一隻小熊貓摘了一隻大南瓜，想把它拿回家。但是這只南瓜太大了，她沒有辦法把這么大的南瓜帶回家。
突然她看見一隻狗熊騎著一輛自行車朝她這邊來。她看著自行車，跳著說：“有了!我有辦法了。我可以把南瓜滾回家去。南瓜好像車輪。
於是她把那瓜滾回家。當她媽媽看到這只大南瓜的時候，很驚訝：“天啊!這么食的南瓜!你是怎麼把它帶回家來的?”小熊貓自豪地說;“我拎不動它，可是我能滾動它啊!”她媽媽微笑著說：“真聰明啊!記住：只要你肯動腦筋，沒有難辦的事。”
英語幽默童話故事：Sleeping Pills
Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.
Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."
"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"
安眠葯
鮑勃晚上失眠。他去看醫生，醫生給他開了一些強力安眠葯。
星期天晚上鮑勃吃了葯，睡得很好，在鬧鍾響之前就醒了過來。他到了辦公室，遛達進去，對老闆說：“我今天早上起床一點麻煩都沒有。”
“好啊!”老闆吼道，“那你星期一和星期二到哪兒去了?”
『柒』 英語幽默閱讀五分鍾
Teacher:If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other,what would I have?
Student:Big hands.
老師：如果我左手上有7個搭扒老桔子,右手上有8個桔子.那麼我有什麼?
學知升生：大手此粗.
『捌』 初二英語笑話帶翻譯精選
「笑話詩」雖有別於中國傳統的古典詩詞,但作為白話詩的一種,其尚「趣」的特質,在中國詩歌史上別開生面。下面是我帶來的初二英語笑話帶翻譯，歡迎閱讀!
Do Me a Favor
The mechanic was very busy when I took my car in for repairs, so I settled down in the waiting room with a book I'd brought along. The mechanic was in and out answering calls, and at one point he stopped and looked at me . "Would you do me a favor and flip back a few pages when someone es in? That way it won't look as if you've been here all day."
Notes:
1 mechanic n.汽車修理師
2 settle down安適地坐下或躺
3 do *** a favor幫助某人
4 flip v.以指捻
Exercises:
根據短文填空
① The mechanic was very busy when I took my car ______ repairs.
② So I______ down in the waiting room with a book I'd brought_____ .
③ The mechanic was ______ and ______answering calls.
④ Would you do me a favor and ______back a few pages when someone es ______?
⑤ That way it won't look_____ _____ you've been here all day.
臘頌49.請幫個余伍忙
我把車拖去修理，機械師很忙。所以我就坐在接待室，拿出我隨身帶來的書讀，機械師出出進進地打招呼。有一次，他停下來看我說：「你能幫我個忙嗎?有人進來時，把書翻回幾頁行嗎?那樣的話，就不會看上去你在這兒呆了一整天了。」
豎局或練習參考答案：
① in; for ② settled; along ③ in ; out ④ flip in ⑤ as; if
初二英語笑話帶翻譯閱讀
Point of No Return
My hu *** and ordered home delivery of our local newspaper. Because we live in rural area where no street numbers are used, I was concerned that the carrier would have trouble finding us. Sure enough, we missed delivery several days despite frequent calls to the circulation department. Finally I phoned to cancel the subscription. "You'll have to tell me your exact location," the woman on the line said. "We can't cancel the subscription unless we know where you live.
Notes:
1 delivery n.遞送
2 rural area鄉村
3 concerned adj.焦慮的;擔心的
4 have trouble doing sth做某事有麻煩
5 despite prep.不管;不顧
6 frequent adj.時常發生的;慣常的
7 circulation n.發行
8 subscription n.訂閱
Exercises:
根據短文選擇正確答案：
① Where did the family live?
A. in the countryside
B. in the suburbs
C. in the urban area
D. near the circulation department of the local newspaper
② What was the wife worried about?
A. She was worried about the quality of the newspaper.
B. She was worried that the carrier would deliver their newspaper to someone else.
C. She was worried that the carrier would find difficulty in finding them.
D. She was worried that the newspaper might not be interesting enough.
③ What happened to them after their ordering?
A. They got the newspaper.
B. The newspaper was cancelled.
C. The circulation department refused to deliver the newspaper to them.
D. For several days they missed delivery.
④ What did they finally decide to do?
A. They decided to cancel the subscription.
B. They decided to cancel the newspaper.
C. They decided to punish the carrier.
D. They decided to take it to court.
⑤ What was the result?
A. The circulation department promised that they would get their delivery in time.
B. The carrier was punished.
C. They could neither get their delivery nor cancel their subscription.
D. The newspaper was cancelled.
50.有去無回
我丈夫預訂了當地報紙的戶送。因為我們住在鄉下，沒有街道號碼，所以我擔心送報員不易找到我們。果真如此，一連幾天都沒有報紙送來，盡管我們頻繁地往發行部打電話詢問。最後我打電話取消訂閱協議。「您得告訴我們您的准確位置，」電話中女子說，「除非我們知道您住在哪裡，否則我們不能取消訂閱協議。」
練習參考答案：
①A②C③D④A⑤C
初二英語笑話帶翻譯學習
The Story of a Snail
When a snail crossed the road, he was run over by a turtle. Regaining consciousness in the emergency room, he was asked what caused the accident.
"I really can't remember," the snail replied. "You see, it all happened so fast."
Notes:
1 snail n.蝸牛
2 run over碾過在地上的某人或某物
3 regain v.恢復
4 consciousness n.知覺
5 emergency n.緊急事件;緊急情況
Exercises:
根據短文回答下列問題：
① What did the snail do one day?
② What happened to him ?
③ Where did he regain consciousness?
④ Could he till remember what caused the accident?
51.蝸牛的故事
一個蝸牛過馬路，被一個烏龜從身上碾過。在急救室里它恢復了知覺，有的人問它事故是怎樣發生的。
「我記不起來了，」蝸牛回答說，「你瞧，一切發生得都太快了。」
練習參考答案：
① He crossed the road.
② He was run over by a turtle.
③ In the emergency room.
④ No, he couldn't.
『玖』 有趣幽默的英語句子閱讀
【 #英語資源# 導語】幽默是人類獨有的品質、能力和交際方式，語言是人類特有的能力和交際工具，幽默的傳達和創造又往往是藉助語言完成的。下面是由 帶來的有趣幽默的英語句子閱讀，歡迎閱讀!【篇一】有趣幽默的英語句子閱讀
01. 人生的遺憾莫過於錯誤地堅持了不該堅持的，輕易地放棄了不該放棄的……
The most regret ion of live is insist on something that shouldn』t be
insisted on, give up something that shouldn』t be given up
02. 大師兄，你知道嗎?二師兄的肉現在比師傅的都貴了。
Tang Monk/Tang Priest, don』t you know piggy is more valuable than you? (The
Pilgrimage to the West)
03. 懷才就像懷孕，時間長了才能看出來。
Having knowledge likes having pregnant, it takes times to be awareness.
04. 還能沖動，表示你還對生活有激情，總是沖動，表示你還不懂生活。
If you acts on impulse, you have passions in life, if you always acts on
impulse, you don』t know what life is.
慧碧05. 我問一個在深圳工作了二十年的朋友：「如果你死後，你的墓誌銘打算寫點啥?」他說：「我解決了住房問題!」
I asked a question to a friend who has been working in Shenzhen for 20
years, what would be the proudest things in your life if you died? He said: I
have already pay back the mortgage loan of my department.
06. 媽媽說人不要前稿舉錯過兩樣東西，最後一班回家的車和一個深愛你的人。
Mom said you』d better not miss two things , the last bus to home and the
person who loves you deeply.
07. 一天看到一位大媽在燒紙，邊燒邊嘟囔著：收到了全都買基金吧~~
One day I saw a old woman was burning paper money and mumbled : buy funds
if you get it.
08. 好的愛情是你透過一個男人看到世界，壞的愛情是你為了一個人舍棄世界……
A good love is you find the world for a man; a bad love is you abandon the
world for a man.
09. 諸葛亮出山前，也沒帶過兵!憑啥我就要工作敬源經驗?
Before Liang Zhuge coming out, he didnt have experience in leading the
army! why i should have experience when look for a job?
10. 如果你看到面前的陰影，別怕，那是因為你的背後有陽光……
If you saw the dark in front of you, dont be afriad, that's because
sunshine is at your back.
【篇二】有趣幽默的英語句子閱讀
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
開始我直接求上帝賜輛自行車。後來我琢磨上帝辦事兒不是這個路數。於是老子偷了一輛然後求上帝寬恕。
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
你永遠不能戰勝一個純SB，因為他會把你的智商拉到跟他個水平，然後用豐富的經驗打敗你.
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
曾以為我想要的是職業，結果發現我只是想要工資。
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
直譯：知識就是說你知道西紅柿是一種水果;智慧就好似不要把它放進水果沙拉里。
意譯a：知識就是告訴你說應該把雞蛋放進籃子，智慧則是叫你不要把所有雞蛋都放進一個籃子。
意譯b：所謂知識就是知道韓少和小四都屬於80後，但智慧告訴你最終還是男女有別。
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
上帝瞅著咱們呢，大夥好歹喜感點吧!
Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
孩子就是：你先花2年，教丫們走路和說話。然後你再花16年教丫們坐定和閉嘴。
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says"If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?
當我填表的時候，有一項是「緊急情況聯系：」 我填上了「醫生」，到時候我媽能幫上什麼忙?!
The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
直譯：小孩子要中間名，純粹是為了讓他知道他啥時候真的有麻煩了。
意譯：起個全名就為了揍孩子前可以底氣十足地喊出來。
It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.
跳樓的時候，「啊——」的時候還沒死， 「啪!」那才是死了。
【篇三】有趣幽默的英語句子閱讀
1. Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you.
麻煩沒來找你，就別去自找麻煩。
第一、四個trouble是動詞，第二、三個trouble是名詞。
2. I think that that that that that student wrote on the blackboard was wrong.
我認為那個學生寫在黑板上的那個「that」是錯誤的。
第一個that是連詞，引起賓語從句;第二、五個that是指示代詞「那個」;第三個that在這兒相當於名詞;第四個that是關系代詞，引起定語從句。
3. I know. You know. I know that you know. I know that you know that I know.
我知道。你知道。我知道你知道。我知道你知道我知道。
4. We must hang together, or we'll be hanged separately.
我們必須團結在一起，否則我們將被一個個絞死。
這是一句雙關語。前面的hang together是「團結一致」的意思，後面的hanged是「絞死」的意思。
5. The quick brown fox jumps over a lazy dog.
那隻敏捷的棕色狐狸跳過了一隻懶惰的狗。
這個句子包含了英語中的26個字母。
6. Was it a bar or a bat I saw?
我看到的是酒吧還是蝙蝠?
這是一句迴文句，順著讀和倒著讀是一樣的。類似於「上海自來水來自海上。」
7. 上聯：To China for china, China with china, dinner on china.
去中國買瓷器，中國有瓷器，吃飯靠瓷器。
下聯：Go front door buy front door, front door no front door,behind door with front door.
到前門買前門，前門沒前門，後門有前門。
這是一副對仗工整、妙趣橫生的英漢對聯。下聯中的第二、四、五個「前門」指「大前門」香煙。
8. 2B or not 2B, that is a ?
這是一種文字簡化游戲。它的意思是：To be or not to be, that is a question. (生存還是毀滅，那是一個問題。)
9. He never saw a saw saw a saw.
他從來沒見過一把鋸子鋸另一把鋸子。
第一個saw是動詞see的過去時，第二和第四個saw帶有不定冠詞"a"在前，是名詞"鋸子",第三個saw是動詞"鋸"。
『拾』 英文短篇幽默小故事大全精選
英文的故事雖然閱讀起來可能會有難度，但是只要每天堅持不懈的閱讀一定的文章，可以很好的增進自身的英文水平,下面這些是我為大家推薦的幾篇。
1：The bulging belly fox
A hungry Fox found in a hollow tree a quantity of bread and meat, which some shepherds had placed there against their return. Delighted with his find he slipped in through the narrow aperture and greedily devoured it all. But when he tried to get out again he found himself so swollen after his big meal that he could not squeeze through the hole, and fell to whining and groaning over his misfortune. Another Fox, happening to pass that way, came and asked him what the matter was; and, on learning the state of the case, said, 「Well, my friend, I see nothing for it but for you to stay where you are till you shrink to your former size; you』ll get out then easily enough.」
2:A Piggy Bank
Once there were lots of toys in a room. There was a saving box on the dresser, and it was a *** all piggy bank. The piggy bank was full of bronze, gold and silver coins.
The piggy bank knew that he had many coins inside of him. That's why he was always proud of himself in front of his friends. "I have a lot of money. It is enough to buy all of you." The piggy bank always looked down from the top of the dresser and said this proudly. Then, the other toys looked up the piggy bank with envious eyes.
One night, the beautiful moonlight poured into the room through a window. The toys in the room were so happy. "Ladies and gentlemen, let's play together on this beautiful night." A baby doll with a red velvet ribbon said. "Okay. Let's play a game." "After that, let's have a tea party." "Wow, it will be exciting!" All the toys shouted for joy.
Everyone except the piggy bank joined the party. "That party must be boring." He held up his head to the ceiling and pretended that he was not interested in the party. He thought it would make him less valuable to join in such an unimportant party.
"Hey, piggy bank! e on and join us. Let's enjoy the party." "e on." Everyone invited him to the party, but the piggy bank ignored their invitation. Therefore, the other toys enjoyed their party without the piggy bank.
A rocking horse put on a knitting ball tail and danced. A rubber ball rolled over, and a toy car drove round everywhere in the room. Everyone seemed so happy.
The piggy bank looked down at them playing and watched with an askance look. Then, the playing was over and the tea party began. The piggy bank couldn't stand not eating when he saw the food, and he came closer step by step to the edge of the dresser.
He *** elled delicious cookies. He suddenly stuck his head towards the toys gathered.
"Clink!" The piggy bank fell down to the floor. When the piggy bank broke into pieces, the bronze, gold and silver coins inside of him scattered noisily.
The other toys were surprised at the piggy bank's fall while they were enjoying the tea party. Everybody looked at the piggy bank with surprise. "Look at that poor piggy bank. He was always proud of himself." "It's so sad. He could not even enjoy the party." All the other toys felt sorry about the piggy bank.
3:The Wind And The Sun
One day the wind said to the sun, 「Look at that man walking along the road. I can get his cloak off more quickly than you can.」 「We will see about that,」 said the sun. 「I will let you try first.」 So the wind tried to make the man take off his cloak. He blew and blew, but the man only pulled his cloak more closely around himself. 「I give up,」 said the wind at last. 「I cannot get his cloak off.」 Then the sun tried. He shone as hard as he could. The man soon became hot and took off his cloak.
的人還：
1.英語幽默小故事
2.簡單幽默英語小故事精選
3.幽默英文小故事精選
4.英語幽默短故事
5.少兒英語幽默小故事精選