幽默的英语阅读初二
『壹』 经典幽默英语笑话8篇
下面是我整理的经典幽默 英语笑话 ，欢迎大家阅读!
经典幽默英语笑话：The New Baby
Mr.and Mrs.Taylor had a seven year old boy named Pat.Now Mrs.Taylor was expecting another child.
Pat had seen babies in other people's houses and had not liked them very much，so he was not delighted about the news that there was soon going to be one in his house too.
One evening Mr.and Mrs.Taylor were making plans for the baby's arrival.This house won't be big enough for us all when the baby comes，said Mr.Taylor.
Pat came into the room just then and said，What are you talking about?We were saying that we'll have to move to an other house now，because the new baby's coming，his mother answered.
It's no use，said Pat hopelessly. He'll follow us there.
新生儿
泰勒夫妇有一个七岁的男孩，名叫帕特。现在泰勒太太正怀着第二胎。
帕特在别人家看见过婴儿，他不太喜欢他们，所以他对自己家里也将有一个婴儿的消息感到不满。
一天晚上，泰勒夫妇正在为这个婴儿的降生计划做安排。泰勒先生说：有了婴儿，我们的房子就太小，不够住了。
帕特恰好在这个时候走进屋，他问：你们在说什么?他的母亲回答说：我们在说我们现在得搬家，因为婴儿就要诞生了。
那没用，帕特绝望地说。他会跟我们到那儿去的。
经典幽默英语笑话：What Are The Two Words?
A very nice old lady had a few words to say to her granddaughter.My dear， said the old lady，I wish you would do something for me.I wish you would promise me never to use two words.One is‘lousy’and the other is‘swell’.Would you promise me that?
Why，sure，Granny，said the girl.What are the two words?
是哪两个词?
一个非常高贵的老夫人有几句话要对她的孙女说。我亲爱的，老夫人说：我希望你能帮我一个忙。我要你答应永远不要用两个词。一个是‘讨厌的’，另一个是‘极好的’。你能答应我吗?
噢，当然，奶奶。女孩说：是哪两个词?
经典幽默英语笑话：What's your name?
A very strict officer was talking to some new soldiers whom he had to train.He had never seen them before,so he began:My name is Stone,and I'm even harder than stone,so do what I tell you or there'll be trouble.Don't try any tricks with me ,and then we'll get on well together
Then he went to each soldier one after another and asked him his name.Speak loudly so that everyone can hear you clearly,He said,and don't forget to call me 'sir'.
Each soldier told him his name,unitl he came to the last one.This man remained silent,and so Captain Stone shouted at him,When I ask you a question,answer it!I'll ask you again:What's you name,soldier?
The soldier was very unhappy,but at last he replied.My name is Stonebreaker,sirhe said nervously.
你叫什么名字?
有一位很严厉的军官在对一群交由他训练的新兵训话。他以前从没见过这群新兵，于是他开始 自我介绍 ：我的名字叫Stone(石头)，事实上，我甚至比石头更强硬。这就是我为什么要告诉你们我名字的原因。不要试图对我玩什么花招，这样我们就能很好相处了。
接着他开始走到每个士兵前面问他们的名字。说大声点，让每个人都能听清楚。另外，不要忘记称呼我为长官。他说。
每个士兵都对他说了自已的名字。他走到最后一位士兵面前时，这个士兵保持着沉默。于是Stone队长对他喊叫，当我问你问题的时候，要回答!我再问一遍，你的名字，士兵?
那个新兵很不高兴，但最后他回答了。我的名字是Stonebreaker(碎石机)，长官。他紧张的说。
经典幽默英语笑话：No Problem
A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop. How can I help you? asked the stylist. I went for a hair transplant, the guy explained, but I couldn't stand the pain. If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you $5,000.
No problem, said the stylist, and he quickly shaved his head.
没问题
一个秃头的男人坐在理发店里。发型师问：有什么可以帮你吗?那个人解释说：我本来去做头发移植，但实在太痛了。如果你能够让我的头发看起来像你的一样，而且没有任何痛苦，我将付给你5000美元。
没问题，发型师说，然后他很快帮自己剃了个光头。
经典幽默英语笑话：
The great painter was asked, one day to paint a picture of Pharaoh crossing the Red Sea. A little while after the picture had been commenced，a hitch arose over the fee，and Hogarth found that he would have to complete the commission for about half the sum he expected. When the work was com pleted， the patron was asked to come and inspect it.As a matter of fact，the picture was just one daub of brilliant red.
What's this? exclaimed the purchaser.I asked for theRed Sea， on the occasion of the celebrated passage.
That's it，replied Hogarth.
But，where are the Israelites?
They are all gone over.
Where are the Egyptians?
They're all drowned.
一天，有人请这位伟大的画家画一幅法老王渡红海图。这幅画刚开始不久，酬金就出现了问题。霍迪斯发现，完成这幅画后，他只能得到他想要的大约一半的钱。当作品完成之后，那位主顾被请来看画。其实，这幅画不过是胡乱涂抹的一片鲜红。
这是什么?那位买主喊了起来。我要的是红海，是那次著名的航海。
这就是，霍迦斯回答说。
可是以色列人在哪儿?
他们都已经渡过去了。
埃及人在哪儿?
他们全都淹死了。
经典幽默英语笑话：人们什么时候说话最少?
Teacher: What is the plural of man,Tom?
老师: 汤姆，“男人”这个词的复数形式是什么?
Tom: Men.
汤姆:男人们。
Teacher: Good. And the plural of child?
老师: 答得好。那“孩子”的复数形式呢?
Tom : Twins.
汤姆: 双胞胎。
经典幽默英语笑话：我丈夫刚进来
The couple seated in restaurant seemed to be having a wonderful time. But as the woman glanced away from the table，their waiter suddenly rushed over.
在饭馆里坐着一对夫妇，他们看上去非常高兴。但是当那女子向旁边瞥了一眼时，服务员马上跑了过来。
“Madam look,”he said.“Your husband just slid under the table.”
“夫人，您瞧,” 他说,“您丈夫滑到桌子底下去了。”
“No,he didn't,”she replied.“My husband just came in the door.”
“不，他没有,” 她回答,“我丈夫刚从门外进来。”
经典幽默英语笑话：有两条裤子
A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible,” she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”
丈夫下班回到家里，发现自己的新娘心绪烦乱。“我心里太难受了，”她说。“我在给你熨西装时把裤子的臀部烧了个大洞。”
“Forget it ,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”
“没事儿，”丈夫安慰她说。“你忘了我这套衣服有两条裤子。”
“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. "And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.”
“是的，”妻子高兴地说，“幸亏你还有一条，我后来就用它来补了这个洞了。”
『贰』 八下英语阅读理解 幽默故事
Jonesie The Great Lion Hunter A *** all village was troubled by a man-eating lion. So its leaders sent a message to the great hunter, Jonesie, to e and kill the beast. For several nights the hunter lay in wait for the lion, but it never appeared. Finally, he told the village chief to kill a cow and give him its hide. Draping the skin over his shoulders, he went to the pasture to wait for the lion. In the middle of the night, the villagers woke to the sound of blood-curdling shrieks ing from the pasture. As they carefully approached, they saw the hunter on the ground, groaning in pain. There was no sign of the lion. "What happened, Jonesie? Where is the lion?" asked the chief. "Fet the damn lion!" he howled. "Which one of you idiots let the bull loose?" <p><a
『叁』 15则经典英语幽默故事
下面是我整理的15则经典英语幽默 故事 ，欢迎大家阅读!
英语幽默故事1.
A: Madam, do you have something in common with your husband?
B: Oh, we have only one point in common—we got married on the same day, in the same month and in the same year.
英语幽默故事2.
After spending all day watching football, Harry fell asleep in front of the TV and spent the night in the chair. In the morning, his wife woke him up. “ Get up, dear,” she said, “ It’s 20 to seven.”
He awoke with a start. “ In whose favor?”
英语幽默故事3.
The miserly millionaire called a family conference, “ I’m placing a box of money in the attic,” he said.” When I die, I intend to grab it on my way up to heaven. See to it that no one touches it until it’s my time too go.”
The family respected his wishes. After his death, the millionaire’s wife looked in the attic. The box was still there. “ THE FOOL!” she said. ”I told him he should have put it in the basement.”
英语幽默故事4.
On the way home from my university, I was going to drop off a friend at her home, when I realized I was lost. I asked her for directions. She said she was not sure of the route. Hoping to jog her memory, I asked, “ what route does your father take when drives you to school?” She didn’t know. I thought it might simplify things if I rephrased the question.” When you go home, which way does he go?”
“ Oh, that’s easy,” she replied. “ He goes back the same way he came.”
英语幽默故事5.
During my second year at university I was having trouble deciding on my major. In a agonizing discussion with my adviser, I decided to double major in astrophysics and theater. Getting up to leave, I said, “ Thanks for your help. But what am I going to do once I graate?”
My adviser shrugged,“ You could be a star,” he said.
英语幽默故事6.
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest’s plate.
The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said, “ You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?”
“ In the rat trap, sir,” replied the boy.
英语幽默故事7.
One professor solemnly addressed the class the day after a big assignment had been e. “ Many of you know me,” he intoned. “And many of you have met my dog, Gus. Obviously, one of you has not.”
“ I apologize to whoever slipped a term paper under my office door,” he continued. “ My dog ate your homework.”
英语幽默故事8.
Just before graation from university, my son and several friends were discussing the role their families had played in their career plans. My son, who had been accepted by a college of optometry, had been quiet ring most of the talk.
“ How about you, Dale?” one of his buddies asked. “ Was you pushy?
“ No, he replied. “ I had complete freedom of choice. I could be any kind of doctor I wanted to be.”
英语幽默故事9.
During my first year at Naval Postgraate School, I sat chatting one day with some classmates about the program’s difficulties. A professor overheard us and tried to allay our fears. “Don’t worry too much about grades,” he explained. “ When you think you know everything, they give you a Bachelor’s degree. Then when you realize that you don’t know anything, they give you a Master’s, and when you find out that you don’t know anything, but neither does anyone else” he continued,” they give you a doctorate.”
英语幽默故事10.
Recently engaged, I asked my aunt, who has been married to Uncle Bob for 34 years, what she thought was the key to the success of their long union. She said, “ Try not to argue, and we respect each other’s privacy.”
At this point Uncle Bob interrupted. “ She works days and I work nights,” he said.
英语幽默故事11.
About two weeks before our fifth anniversary of marriage, my husband asked what I would like for a gift. I told him I wanted something impractical and romantic.
On our anniversary night, he presented me with a lovely gold bracelet. “ A little four-letter word made me get this for you,” he said softly.
“Oh, how sweet,” I whispered. “L-O-V-E?’
“No,’ he replied. “S-A-l-E.”
英语幽默故事12.
A: Oh, how nice your bookshelf is! But it’s a pity that it is empty without any books in it.
B: I had no bookshelf in the past. In order to buy the bookshelf, I have sold all my books. Don’t you know?
英语幽默故事13.
M: Do you love your bride?
Bridegroom: Yes, of course. I love her very much.
M: Are you willing to accompany with your husband forever?
Bride (with head shaking repeatedly): Of course not. He is a postman, how can I accompany with him all the whole day?
英语幽默故事14.
“Joe is the man for me,” said a starry-eyed young lady to her mother, “ He’s nice. He’s handsome. He’s smart. He’s hardworking. He’s strong. He’s kind…..”
“He’s married” interrupted her mother.
“ So nobody is perfect.”
英语幽默故事15.
A tobacco-company executive traveled the country looking for long-time smoker in good health. He found one man who admitted to smoking for 70 years. “ If you do a commercial for us,” the executive explained. “ We’ll pay you $10,000.”
“It’s a deal,” said the smoker. “When do I start?”
“How about 10 A.M. Tomorrow?”
“Can’t do it then, son—I never quit coughing till noon.”
『肆』 幽默类的英语短文阅读
随着经济全球化的发展和国际交往的日益频繁,语言成为人们互相交流的重要桥梁。英语教学已成为各级学校的重点教学内容。本文是幽默类的英语短文，希望对大家有帮助!
幽默类的英语短文：Be Careful What You Wish For
A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.
During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the hu *** and's turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I'd like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.
慎重许愿
一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。他们恰好在同一天出生。
庆祝活动中，一位仙女出现了。她说，由于他们是已经结婚25年的恩爱夫妻，因此她给许给这对夫妻每个人一个愿望。
妻子想周游世界。仙女招了招手。“呯!”的一声，她的手中出现了一张票。
接下来该丈夫许愿了。他犹豫片刻，害羞地说，“那我想要一位比我年轻30岁的女人。”
仙女拾起了魔术棒。“呯!”，他变成了90岁。
幽默类的英语短文：Reached Shore Fast 快速靠岸
A guy I know was towing his boat home from a fishing trip to Lake Huron when his car broke down. He didn't have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be able to raise someone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance.
He climbed into his boat, clicked on the radio and said, "Mayday, mayday."
A Coast Guard officer came on and said, "State your location."
"I-75, two miles south of Standish."
After a very long pause, the officer asked, "How fast were you going when you reached shore?"
在休伦湖钓完鱼后，我的一个朋友开车拖着他的船回家。路上车坏了。他没带手机，不过，他想，也许他可以通过海事无线广播来请求公路援助。
于是，他爬到他的船里面，启动了无线装置，喊道，“求救，求救”。
一名海岸护卫队警官作出了回应，“报告你的位置”。
“I-75号公路，Standish的南面两英里”。
沉默了好一会之后，警官问我的朋友，“你的船靠岸时开得有多快?”
幽默类的英语短文：Friend for Dinner
Honey, said the hu *** and to his wife, I invited a friend home for supper.
What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I havent been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I dont feel like cooking a fancy meal!
I know all that.
Then why did you invite a friend for supper?
Because the poor fools thinking about getting married.
请朋友吃饭
“亲爱的，”丈夫对妻子说：“我邀请了一位朋友回家吃晚饭。”
“什么?你疯了吗?我们的房子乱糟糟的，我很久没有买过东西回来了，所有的碗碟都是脏的，还有，我可不想做一餐累死人的晚饭。”
“这些我全都知道。”
“那你为什么还要邀请朋友回来吃晚饭?”
“因为那个可怜的笨蛋正考虑要结婚呢。”
幽默类的英语短文：A Peddler of Selling Earthen Basins ***卖瓦盆的小贩***
A peddler sold earthen basins in the wayside, he chanted as knocked :"Earthen basin is round, beautiful and solid, judging by the sound, they are all good." At the time of his knocking, that earthen basin was broken into pieces with a crack***爆裂声*** . Lookers-on burst into the roars of laughter. He threw the fragments***碎片，残片*** without extra trouble into paddy***稻谷，稻田*** field, but an experienced peasant from the crowd did not let him off***放过，不惩罚*** easily:" How the deuce ***强式特指问句*** can you throw them into my field? They’ll impede ***妨碍***my growing crops!" The peddler who sold earthen basins tried to explain it away promptly:" Nothing, the fragments will be converted into powder as soon as they absorbed water ."
一个小贩在路边卖瓦盆，他一边敲一边唱：“瓦盆圆又圆，结实又好看，光听这声音，就知不一般。”敲著敲著，“啪啦”一声，把盆敲烂了。围观的人一阵哄笑。他顺手把碎片扔进了稻田里，谁知人群中一个老农不干了：“你怎么能往我地里扔?这不影响我种田吗?” 卖瓦盆的小贩连忙辩解：“不要紧，瓦片见水一会儿就粉了。”
『伍』 英语小幽默故事50字
① 少于50字的搞笑英语小短文「带翻译」
1、Text(正文):The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled . His father knew it, but hisgrandma doted on him. He hardly left her side.
And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum. Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.
When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door.
"Was school all right?" she asked, "Did you get along all right? did you cry?"
"Cry?" John asked. "No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!"
六岁的约翰娇生惯养。他的父亲知道这一点，可他的祖父母仍然宠着他。这孩子几乎寸步不离他的祖母。他想要什么不是哭，就是闹。他第一天上学才离开祖母的怀抱。
约翰放学了，他奶奶在门口接他并问道：“学校怎么样？你过的好吗？哭了没有？”
“哭？”约翰问，“不，我没哭，可老师哭了。”
2、Text(正文):The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."
"Why use my elbow and foot?"
"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not ing empty-hangded, are you?"
一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了大没。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼，找中间那个门，然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后，再用你的脚把门推开。”
“为什么要用我的肘和脚呢？”
“你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪，你总不会空着手来吧？”吝啬鬼回答。
3、Text(正文):One evening I drove my hu *** and's car to the shopping mall.On my return, I noticed that how sty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit.
When I finally entered the house, I called out."The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."
My hu *** and looked up and said, "Mom's here?"
一滚喊纳天晚上我开着丈夫的车渗隐去购物，回来后发现车身沾满灰尘，于是擦洗了一阵。当我终于走进屋里时大声喊：“世界上最爱你的女人刚擦洗了你的车灯和挡风玻璃。”我丈夫抬头看了看，说：“妈妈来了？
4、Text(正文):"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me."
He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants recing by nearly fifty pounds.
Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I'm an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."
“医生”她冲进屋后大声说道。
“我想让你坦率地说我到底得了什么病。”
他从头到脚打量打量她，然后大声说：“太太，我有三件事要对你说。第一，您的体重需要减少大约50磅；第二，如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口红，您的美貌将会改变。第三，我是一位画家——医生住在楼下。”
5、Text(正文):A 747 was halfway across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker, "Attention, passengers. We have lost one of our engines, but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately, we will arrive an hour late as a result."
Shortly thereafter, the passengers heard the captain's voice again, "Guess what, folks. We just lost our third engine, but please be assured we can fly with only one. We will now arrive in London three hours late."
At this point, one passenger became furious. "For Pete's sake," he shouted, "If we lose another engine, we'll be up here all night!"
一架747客机正在跨越大西洋时，喇叭里传来了机长的声音：“旅客们请注意，我们的四个引擎中有一个丢失了。但剩下的三个引擎会把我们带到伦敦的。只是我们要因此晚到一小时。”
过了一会儿，旅客们又听到机长的声音：“各位，你们猜怎么啦？我们刚又掉了第三个引擎。但请你们相信好了。只有一个引擎我们也能飞，但要晚三个小时了。” 正在这时，一位乘客非常气愤地说：“看在上帝的份上，如果我们再掉一个引擎，我们就要整夜都要呆在天上了。”
(1)英语小幽默故事50字扩展阅读：
第一个笑话中spoil造句示例如下：
1、Others say they do not want to spoil their children by leaving them too much.
还有人表示，他们不想给子女留下太多钱，以免宠坏他们。
2、Once you pop open the cork, wines can spoil in a matter of hours.
一旦你打开软木塞，葡萄酒就会在数小时内变质。
3、They say it only takes a few bad apples to spoil the bunch.
他们说这只需要少数的害群之马便可毁了一堆。
4、A fond mother may spoil her child.溺爱的母亲可能会宠坏她的孩子。
5、The child was spoilt by his grandfather.这个孩子被他的爷爷给惯坏了。
② 英语幽默小故事50字左右（带翻译）
Q: Why won’t the elephant use the puter?
为什么大象不玩电脑？
A: He’s afraid of the mouse!
他害怕老鼠！
鼠标和老鼠的英文皆为mouse。
mouse [maʊs]n. 鼠标；老鼠；胆小羞怯的人
2.A much worried patiant walked into the doctor's office and asked for help。
"Doctor, I don't know what to do. I accidentally drank a bottle of gasoline yesterday."
"Oh, don't worry! All you have to remember is not to *** oke in the next few days." The doctor said.
一位很焦急的病人走到医生办公室寻求帮助。
“医生，我不知道该怎么办。昨天我不小心喝下了一瓶汽油。”
“哦，不用担心。你一定要牢记未来几天不要吸烟就行了。”医生说。
3.A man was hit by a cab in the street.
He was brought to the hospital.
His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill."
"I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor,
Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive."
"Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"
一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.
他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."
医生说:"我怕他已经死了."
听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."
妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多."
4.A man goes to church and starts talking to God.
He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?"
And God says: "A penny".
Then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?"
And God says: "a second",
Then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?"
And God says "In a second".
一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.
他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"
上帝回答:"一便士."
男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"
上帝说:"一秒钟."
最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"
上帝回答:"过一秒钟."
5.Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny?
Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？
约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？
约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。
6.Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
③ 英语小故事【简短些，50字】
英语幽默故事简短，内容诙谐幽默，情节生动有趣，相信在你在阅读的同时也可以一起学习英语哦。
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英语小故事分享：
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. a woman is driving down the same road.
As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "pig!!"
The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "witch!!"
They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.
if only men would listen.
不知道如何选择英语机构，可以网络咨询“阿西吧vivi老师”；
如果想下载免费英语资源，可以网络搜索“阿西吧官网论坛”。
The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly o hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"
"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".
教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时，他的话题又来了：“让我回向进化论者提个问题——如果我答们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴，那么现在尾巴到哪里去了？”
“我来试试看，”一位老太太说。
“该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。”
⑤ 英语小故事带翻译10篇50字
英语小故事—The Real Princess
小学403字
There was once a prince who wished to marry a princess; but then she must be a real princess. He travelled all over the world in hopes of finding such a lady; but there was always something wrong. Princesses he found in plenty; but whether they were real princesses it was impossible for him to decide, for now one thing, now another, seemed to him not quite right about the ladies. At last he returned to his palace quite cast down, because he wished so much to have a real Princess for his wife.
从前有一位王子，他想找一位公主结婚，但她必须是一位真正的公主。他走遍了全世界，想要寻到这样的一位公主。可是无论他到什么地方，他总是碰到一些障碍。公主倒有的是，不过他没有办法断定她们究竟是不是真正的公主，她们好象总是有些地方不大对头。结果，他只好回到自己的皇宫来，心中很不快活，因为他是那么渴望着得到一位真正的公主。
One evening a fearful tempest arose, it thundered and lightened, and the rain poured down from the sky in torrents: besides, it was as dark as pitch. All at once there was heard a violent knocking at the door, and the old King, the Prince's father, went out himself to open it.
It was a princess who was standing outside the door. What with the rain and the wind, she was in a sad condition; the water trickled down from her hair, and her clothes clung to her body. She said she was a real princess.
有一天晚上，忽然起了一阵可怕的暴风雨。天空中风驰电掣，大雨倾盆而降，四周一片漆黑。就在这时，响起了一阵剧烈的敲门声，老国王自己去开门。
站在城外的是一位公主。可是，天哪!经过了风吹雨打之后，她的样子是多么难看啊!水沿着她的头发和向下面流，她的衣服粘在身上。她说她是真正的公主。
Ah! we shall soon see that! thought the old Queen-mother; however, she said not a word of what she was going to do; but went quietly into the bedroom, took all the bed-clothes off the bed, and put a little pea on the bedstead. She then laid enty mattresses one upon another over the
pea, and put enty feather beds over the mattresses.
Upon this bed the Princess was to pass the night.
是的，这点我们马上就可以考查出来。 老皇后心里想，可是她什么也没说。她静静地走进卧房，把所有的被褥都搬开，在床榻上放了一粒豌豆。然后她取出二十床垫子，把它们压在豌豆上。随后，她又在这些垫子上放了二十床鸭绒被。
这位公主夜里就睡在这些东西上面。
The next morning she was asked how she had slept. Oh, very badly indeed! she replied. I have scarcely closed my eyes the whole night through. I do not know what was in my bed, but I had something hard under me, and am all over black and blue. It has hurt me so much!
Now it was plain that the lady must be a real Princess, since she had been able to feel the little pea through the enty mattresses and enty feather beds. None but a real Princess could have had such a delicate sense of feeling.
So the prince took her for his wife, for now he knew that he had a real princess; and the pea was put in the museum, where it may still be seen, if no one has stolen it.
豌豆公主
第二天早晨大家问她昨晚睡得怎样。 啊，不舒服极了! 公主说， 我差不多整夜没合上眼!天晓得我床上有件什么东西?我睡到一块很硬的东西上面，弄得我全身发青发紫，这真怕人!
现在大家就看出来了。她是一位真正的公主，因为压在这二十床垫子和二十床鸭绒被下面的一粒豌豆，她居然还能感觉得出来。除了真正的公主以外，任何人都不会有这么嫩的皮肤的。
因此那位王子就选她为妻子了，因为现在他知道他得到了一位真正的公主。这粒豌豆因此也就被送进了博物馆，如果没有人把它拿走的话，人们现在还可以在那儿看到它呢。
⑥ 求英文幽默小故事 少一点 越少越好 带中文翻译
1 理所当然
Taken for Granted
THE SCHOOL HEALTH FORMS had been distributed to the students with an error---the word "Sex" had been spelled with an "o". One mother, filling out the form for her son, wrote in the blank next to "Sox": "Usually brown."
某学校发给学生的健康调查表里有个错别字——把“性别”的“性”字写成了“袜”字。一位母亲在为她的儿子填写表格时，在“袜别”的那栏填上了：“棕色为主。”
[注] 英语 中sex（性）与sox（袜）只有一个字母之差。
2 一只小猫
Mrs Brown went to visit one of her friend and carried a *** all box with holes punched in the top.
" What's in your box?" asked the friend.
"A cat," answered Mrs Brown. "You see I've been dreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catch them."
"But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend.
"So is the cat," whispered Mrs Brown.
布朗夫人去拜访一位朋友，她拿着一个顶部扎满了小眼儿的盒子。 “盒子里装的是什么？”朋友问道。 “一只小猫，” 布朗夫人回答说，“你知道我晚上睡觉总梦见老鼠，我非常害怕。这只猫可以抓住那些老鼠。” “可老鼠都是假想的呀。”朋友说。 “小猫也是假想的。” 布朗夫人小声说道。
3 约会
When the young waitress in the café in Tom's building started waving hello everyday. Tom was flattered, for she was at least 15 years younger than he. One day she waved and beckoned to Tom again. When Tom strolled over, she asked, "Are you single?"
"Why, yes," Tom replied, *** iling at her broadly.
"So is my mom," she said. "Would you like to meet her?"
在汤姆工作的大楼里有一个咖啡屋，那儿总有一位小姐每天都和他打招呼。汤姆有些受宠若惊，因为这位小姐看上去至少比他年轻15岁。一天她又对汤姆招手并示意汤姆过去。于是汤姆走了过去。她问道，“您现在是单身吗？” “对，是单身，”汤姆满脸堆笑的说。 “我母亲也是，”她说，“您愿不愿意见见她？”
⑦ 10篇英语小故事50字
Just after class,a teacher asked to a student"Boy,why have you got cotton in your ear?Is it infected?You look very pain," "No,sir,but you just told me everything my a ear went in one ear and out.so I am trying to stop it."
“孩子,你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵?它感染了吗?” “没有,老师.可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进,一个耳朵里出,所以我要把它堵在里面.”
Last week,Mrs Black went to London.She didn’t know London very well,and she lost her way.Suddenly she saw a man near a bus stop.She went up to the man and said,“Excuse me!Can you tell me the way to the hospital,please?” The man *** iled.He didn’t know English!He came from Germany.But then he put his hand into his pocket,and took out an English dictionary.He looked up some words.Then he said slowly,“I’m sorry I can’t understand you.”
上周,布莱克夫人去了一趟伦敦.她不太熟悉伦敦,结果她迷路了.突然她在一个公共汽车站附近看见一位男子.她急忙向这位男子走去,说道：“劳驾您一下!请您告诉我去医院的路,好吗?”这位男子笑了.他听不懂英语.他来自德国.但是他将手伸进了自己的衣袋里,从里面掏出了一本英语词典.他查找到了一些单词.然后他一字一句地说：“我很抱歉我听不懂你说的话.”
It was a cold winter day in 1919.A *** all boy was walking along the street in London.His name was Tom.He was very hungry.He wanted to buy some bread,but he had no money.What could he do?When he was very young,he wanted to be a great man in the world of films.So he worked to sing and dance well.Thirty years later,the boy became one of the famous people in the world.
那是1919年的一个寒冷的冬天.一个小男孩正漫步在伦敦的街头.他的名字叫汤姆.他饿极了.他想买一些面包,可是他身无分文.他该怎么办呢?当他非常年幼的时候,他就想当一名电影世界中的伟人.所以他努力把歌唱好,把舞跳好.三十年之后,这个小男孩真地成为了电影世界中的著名人物之一.
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for o cents."What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly."Here are o cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱.
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说.“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说.“再给你两分钱.可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的
『陆』 英语幽默童话故事
多阅读一些英语童话小 故事 ,会提高孩子的 英语阅读 能力而且对口语和词汇量的增加也有所帮助。下面是我整理的英语幽默 童话故事 ，汉语大家阅读。
英语幽默童话故事： I can’t Cook It
It’s sunny day in spring. Miss Cat is fishing. Suddenly the fishing rod moves. “Great! Oh, it’s so heavy!” Miss Cat says happily.
The fish is plucked out of the river. “Oh, a big fish! How big the fish is!” She cheers. But she puts the fish into the river and goes on fishing.
At the time Mr. House goes by and sees it. “What do you set it free?” He asks. “Because my pot is too small. I can’t cook it,” Miss Cat says.
我没法煮它
这是春天里一个阳光明媚的日子，猫小姐在河边钓鱼。突然鱼竿动了动。“太棒了!哇，好重啊!”猫小姐高兴地喊着。
鱼被拉出来了。“啊!一条大鱼!这条大鱼可真大呀!”她欢呼道。但是她却把鱼放回河里，又继续钓鱼。
这时候马先生路过，看见这一切，就问她：“为什么你把鱼放了?” “因为我的锅太小。我没办法烧这么大的鱼。”猫小姐回答说。
英语幽默童话故事： Count Tomorrow Morning
It’s a right. John is looking at the sky.
Tom is John’s younger brother. He asks John “What are you doing?”
John says, “I’m counting stars.”
Tom laughs and says, “It’s really dark now. Why not count them tomorrow morning?”
明天早上数
这是一个晚上。约翰抬头看着天空。
汤姆是约翰的弟弟。他问约翰：“你在干什么?”
约翰说：“我在数星星。”
汤姆笑着说：“现在天空太黑了。你为什么不等到明天早上再数呢?”
英语幽默童话故事： I Don’t Like Her
Bob goes to a new school.
One day he comes back, “Bob, do you like your new teacher?” his mother asks.
“I don’t like her, Mother. Because first she says that three and three is six, and then she says that two and four is six, too.”
我不喜欢她
鲍勃的去了所新学校。
一天， 他回到家，他妈妈问他：“你喜欢你的新老师吗?”
“不，我不喜欢她，妈妈。因为她先说3加3等于6，然后她又说2加4等于6.”
英语幽默童话故事：Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父亲与小儿子一块儿回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
英语幽默童话故事：
The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"
"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".
教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时，他的话题又来了：“让我向进化论者提个问题——如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴，那么现在尾巴到哪里去了?”
“我来试试看，”一位老太太说。
“该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。”
英语幽默童话故事：
Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today?
Student: Of course. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.
一名伟人
老师：如果莎士比亚还活着，他会是一名伟人吗?
学生：当然。因为到目前为止，还没有人活到400多岁。
英语幽默童话故事： A Clever Panda
A little panda picks up a pumpkin and wants to take it home. But the pumpkin is too big. The panda can’t take it home.
Suddenly she sees a bear riding a bike toward her. She watches the bike. “I know! I have a good idea.” she jumps and shouts happily, “I can roll a pumpkin. It’s like a wheel.”
So she rolls the pumpkin to her home. When her mother sees the big pumpkin, she is surprised, “Oh, my God! How can you carry it home?” the little panda answers proudly, “I can’t lift it, but I can roll it.” Her mother smiled and says，“What a clever girl! Use you heard to do something,”
聪明的熊猫
一只小熊猫摘了一只大南瓜，想把它拿回家。但是这只南瓜太大了，她没有办法把这么大的南瓜带回家。
突然她看见一只狗熊骑着一辆自行车朝她这边来。她看着自行车，跳着说：“有了!我有办法了。我可以把南瓜滚回家去。南瓜好像车轮。
于是她把那瓜滚回家。当她妈妈看到这只大南瓜的时候，很惊讶：“天啊!这么食的南瓜!你是怎么把它带回家来的?”小熊猫自豪地说;“我拎不动它，可是我能滚动它啊!”她妈妈微笑着说：“真聪明啊!记住：只要你肯动脑筋，没有难办的事。”
英语幽默童话故事：Sleeping Pills
Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.
Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."
"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"
安眠药
鲍勃晚上失眠。他去看医生，医生给他开了一些强力安眠药。
星期天晚上鲍勃吃了药，睡得很好，在闹钟响之前就醒了过来。他到了办公室，遛达进去，对老板说：“我今天早上起床一点麻烦都没有。”
“好啊!”老板吼道，“那你星期一和星期二到哪儿去了?”
『柒』 英语幽默阅读五分钟
Teacher:If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other,what would I have?
Student:Big hands.
老师：如果我左手上有7个搭扒老桔子,右手上有8个桔子.那么我有什么?
学知升生：大手此粗.
『捌』 初二英语笑话带翻译精选
“笑话诗”虽有别于中国传统的古典诗词,但作为白话诗的一种,其尚“趣”的特质,在中国诗歌史上别开生面。下面是我带来的初二英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!
Do Me a Favor
The mechanic was very busy when I took my car in for repairs, so I settled down in the waiting room with a book I'd brought along. The mechanic was in and out answering calls, and at one point he stopped and looked at me . "Would you do me a favor and flip back a few pages when someone es in? That way it won't look as if you've been here all day."
Notes:
1 mechanic n.汽车修理师
2 settle down安适地坐下或躺
3 do *** a favor帮助某人
4 flip v.以指捻
Exercises:
根据短文填空
① The mechanic was very busy when I took my car ______ repairs.
② So I______ down in the waiting room with a book I'd brought_____ .
③ The mechanic was ______ and ______answering calls.
④ Would you do me a favor and ______back a few pages when someone es ______?
⑤ That way it won't look_____ _____ you've been here all day.
腊颂49.请帮个余伍忙
我把车拖去修理，机械师很忙。所以我就坐在接待室，拿出我随身带来的书读，机械师出出进进地打招呼。有一次，他停下来看我说：“你能帮我个忙吗?有人进来时，把书翻回几页行吗?那样的话，就不会看上去你在这儿呆了一整天了。”
竖局或练习参考答案：
① in; for ② settled; along ③ in ; out ④ flip in ⑤ as; if
初二英语笑话带翻译阅读
Point of No Return
My hu *** and ordered home delivery of our local newspaper. Because we live in rural area where no street numbers are used, I was concerned that the carrier would have trouble finding us. Sure enough, we missed delivery several days despite frequent calls to the circulation department. Finally I phoned to cancel the subscription. "You'll have to tell me your exact location," the woman on the line said. "We can't cancel the subscription unless we know where you live.
Notes:
1 delivery n.递送
2 rural area乡村
3 concerned adj.焦虑的;担心的
4 have trouble doing sth做某事有麻烦
5 despite prep.不管;不顾
6 frequent adj.时常发生的;惯常的
7 circulation n.发行
8 subscription n.订阅
Exercises:
根据短文选择正确答案：
① Where did the family live?
A. in the countryside
B. in the suburbs
C. in the urban area
D. near the circulation department of the local newspaper
② What was the wife worried about?
A. She was worried about the quality of the newspaper.
B. She was worried that the carrier would deliver their newspaper to someone else.
C. She was worried that the carrier would find difficulty in finding them.
D. She was worried that the newspaper might not be interesting enough.
③ What happened to them after their ordering?
A. They got the newspaper.
B. The newspaper was cancelled.
C. The circulation department refused to deliver the newspaper to them.
D. For several days they missed delivery.
④ What did they finally decide to do?
A. They decided to cancel the subscription.
B. They decided to cancel the newspaper.
C. They decided to punish the carrier.
D. They decided to take it to court.
⑤ What was the result?
A. The circulation department promised that they would get their delivery in time.
B. The carrier was punished.
C. They could neither get their delivery nor cancel their subscription.
D. The newspaper was cancelled.
50.有去无回
我丈夫预订了当地报纸的户送。因为我们住在乡下，没有街道号码，所以我担心送报员不易找到我们。果真如此，一连几天都没有报纸送来，尽管我们频繁地往发行部打电话询问。最后我打电话取消订阅协议。“您得告诉我们您的准确位置，”电话中女子说，“除非我们知道您住在哪里，否则我们不能取消订阅协议。”
练习参考答案：
①A②C③D④A⑤C
初二英语笑话带翻译学习
The Story of a Snail
When a snail crossed the road, he was run over by a turtle. Regaining consciousness in the emergency room, he was asked what caused the accident.
"I really can't remember," the snail replied. "You see, it all happened so fast."
Notes:
1 snail n.蜗牛
2 run over碾过在地上的某人或某物
3 regain v.恢复
4 consciousness n.知觉
5 emergency n.紧急事件;紧急情况
Exercises:
根据短文回答下列问题：
① What did the snail do one day?
② What happened to him ?
③ Where did he regain consciousness?
④ Could he till remember what caused the accident?
51.蜗牛的故事
一个蜗牛过马路，被一个乌龟从身上碾过。在急救室里它恢复了知觉，有的人问它事故是怎样发生的。
“我记不起来了，”蜗牛回答说，“你瞧，一切发生得都太快了。”
练习参考答案：
① He crossed the road.
② He was run over by a turtle.
③ In the emergency room.
④ No, he couldn't.
『玖』 有趣幽默的英语句子阅读
【 #英语资源# 导语】幽默是人类独有的品质、能力和交际方式，语言是人类特有的能力和交际工具，幽默的传达和创造又往往是借助语言完成的。下面是由 带来的有趣幽默的英语句子阅读，欢迎阅读!【篇一】有趣幽默的英语句子阅读
01. 人生的遗憾莫过于错误地坚持了不该坚持的，轻易地放弃了不该放弃的……
The most regret ion of live is insist on something that shouldn’t be
insisted on, give up something that shouldn’t be given up
02. 大师兄，你知道吗?二师兄的肉现在比师傅的都贵了。
Tang Monk/Tang Priest, don’t you know piggy is more valuable than you? (The
Pilgrimage to the West)
03. 怀才就像怀孕，时间长了才能看出来。
Having knowledge likes having pregnant, it takes times to be awareness.
04. 还能冲动，表示你还对生活有激情，总是冲动，表示你还不懂生活。
If you acts on impulse, you have passions in life, if you always acts on
impulse, you don’t know what life is.
慧碧05. 我问一个在深圳工作了二十年的朋友：“如果你死后，你的墓志铭打算写点啥?”他说：“我解决了住房问题!”
I asked a question to a friend who has been working in Shenzhen for 20
years, what would be the proudest things in your life if you died? He said: I
have already pay back the mortgage loan of my department.
06. 妈妈说人不要前稿举错过两样东西，最后一班回家的车和一个深爱你的人。
Mom said you’d better not miss two things , the last bus to home and the
person who loves you deeply.
07. 一天看到一位大妈在烧纸，边烧边嘟囔着：收到了全都买基金吧~~
One day I saw a old woman was burning paper money and mumbled : buy funds
if you get it.
08. 好的爱情是你透过一个男人看到世界，坏的爱情是你为了一个人舍弃世界……
A good love is you find the world for a man; a bad love is you abandon the
world for a man.
09. 诸葛亮出山前，也没带过兵!凭啥我就要工作敬源经验?
Before Liang Zhuge coming out, he didnt have experience in leading the
army! why i should have experience when look for a job?
10. 如果你看到面前的阴影，别怕，那是因为你的背后有阳光……
If you saw the dark in front of you, dont be afriad, that's because
sunshine is at your back.
【篇二】有趣幽默的英语句子阅读
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
开始我直接求上帝赐辆自行车。后来我琢磨上帝办事儿不是这个路数。于是老子偷了一辆然后求上帝宽恕。
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
你永远不能战胜一个纯SB，因为他会把你的智商拉到跟他个水平，然后用丰富的经验打败你.
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
曾以为我想要的是职业，结果发现我只是想要工资。
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
直译：知识就是说你知道西红柿是一种水果;智慧就好似不要把它放进水果沙拉里。
意译a：知识就是告诉你说应该把鸡蛋放进篮子，智慧则是叫你不要把所有鸡蛋都放进一个篮子。
意译b：所谓知识就是知道韩少和小四都属于80后，但智慧告诉你最终还是男女有别。
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
上帝瞅着咱们呢，大伙好歹喜感点吧!
Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
孩子就是：你先花2年，教丫们走路和说话。然后你再花16年教丫们坐定和闭嘴。
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says"If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?
当我填表的时候，有一项是“紧急情况联系：” 我填上了“医生”，到时候我妈能帮上什么忙?!
The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
直译：小孩子要中间名，纯粹是为了让他知道他啥时候真的有麻烦了。
意译：起个全名就为了揍孩子前可以底气十足地喊出来。
It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.
跳楼的时候，“啊——”的时候还没死， “啪!”那才是死了。
【篇三】有趣幽默的英语句子阅读
1. Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you.
麻烦没来找你，就别去自找麻烦。
第一、四个trouble是动词，第二、三个trouble是名词。
2. I think that that that that that student wrote on the blackboard was wrong.
我认为那个学生写在黑板上的那个“that”是错误的。
第一个that是连词，引起宾语从句;第二、五个that是指示代词“那个”;第三个that在这儿相当于名词;第四个that是关系代词，引起定语从句。
3. I know. You know. I know that you know. I know that you know that I know.
我知道。你知道。我知道你知道。我知道你知道我知道。
4. We must hang together, or we'll be hanged separately.
我们必须团结在一起，否则我们将被一个个绞死。
这是一句双关语。前面的hang together是“团结一致”的意思，后面的hanged是“绞死”的意思。
5. The quick brown fox jumps over a lazy dog.
那只敏捷的棕色狐狸跳过了一只懒惰的狗。
这个句子包含了英语中的26个字母。
6. Was it a bar or a bat I saw?
我看到的是酒吧还是蝙蝠?
这是一句回文句，顺着读和倒着读是一样的。类似于“上海自来水来自海上。”
7. 上联：To China for china, China with china, dinner on china.
去中国买瓷器，中国有瓷器，吃饭靠瓷器。
下联：Go front door buy front door, front door no front door,behind door with front door.
到前门买前门，前门没前门，后门有前门。
这是一副对仗工整、妙趣横生的英汉对联。下联中的第二、四、五个“前门”指“大前门”香烟。
8. 2B or not 2B, that is a ?
这是一种文字简化游戏。它的意思是：To be or not to be, that is a question. (生存还是毁灭，那是一个问题。)
9. He never saw a saw saw a saw.
他从来没见过一把锯子锯另一把锯子。
第一个saw是动词see的过去时，第二和第四个saw带有不定冠词"a"在前，是名词"锯子",第三个saw是动词"锯"。
『拾』 英文短篇幽默小故事大全精选
英文的故事虽然阅读起来可能会有难度，但是只要每天坚持不懈的阅读一定的文章，可以很好的增进自身的英文水平,下面这些是我为大家推荐的几篇。
1：The bulging belly fox
A hungry Fox found in a hollow tree a quantity of bread and meat, which some shepherds had placed there against their return. Delighted with his find he slipped in through the narrow aperture and greedily devoured it all. But when he tried to get out again he found himself so swollen after his big meal that he could not squeeze through the hole, and fell to whining and groaning over his misfortune. Another Fox, happening to pass that way, came and asked him what the matter was; and, on learning the state of the case, said, “Well, my friend, I see nothing for it but for you to stay where you are till you shrink to your former size; you’ll get out then easily enough.”
2:A Piggy Bank
Once there were lots of toys in a room. There was a saving box on the dresser, and it was a *** all piggy bank. The piggy bank was full of bronze, gold and silver coins.
The piggy bank knew that he had many coins inside of him. That's why he was always proud of himself in front of his friends. "I have a lot of money. It is enough to buy all of you." The piggy bank always looked down from the top of the dresser and said this proudly. Then, the other toys looked up the piggy bank with envious eyes.
One night, the beautiful moonlight poured into the room through a window. The toys in the room were so happy. "Ladies and gentlemen, let's play together on this beautiful night." A baby doll with a red velvet ribbon said. "Okay. Let's play a game." "After that, let's have a tea party." "Wow, it will be exciting!" All the toys shouted for joy.
Everyone except the piggy bank joined the party. "That party must be boring." He held up his head to the ceiling and pretended that he was not interested in the party. He thought it would make him less valuable to join in such an unimportant party.
"Hey, piggy bank! e on and join us. Let's enjoy the party." "e on." Everyone invited him to the party, but the piggy bank ignored their invitation. Therefore, the other toys enjoyed their party without the piggy bank.
A rocking horse put on a knitting ball tail and danced. A rubber ball rolled over, and a toy car drove round everywhere in the room. Everyone seemed so happy.
The piggy bank looked down at them playing and watched with an askance look. Then, the playing was over and the tea party began. The piggy bank couldn't stand not eating when he saw the food, and he came closer step by step to the edge of the dresser.
He *** elled delicious cookies. He suddenly stuck his head towards the toys gathered.
"Clink!" The piggy bank fell down to the floor. When the piggy bank broke into pieces, the bronze, gold and silver coins inside of him scattered noisily.
The other toys were surprised at the piggy bank's fall while they were enjoying the tea party. Everybody looked at the piggy bank with surprise. "Look at that poor piggy bank. He was always proud of himself." "It's so sad. He could not even enjoy the party." All the other toys felt sorry about the piggy bank.
3:The Wind And The Sun
One day the wind said to the sun, “Look at that man walking along the road. I can get his cloak off more quickly than you can.” “We will see about that,” said the sun. “I will let you try first.” So the wind tried to make the man take off his cloak. He blew and blew, but the man only pulled his cloak more closely around himself. “I give up,” said the wind at last. “I cannot get his cloak off.” Then the sun tried. He shone as hard as he could. The man soon became hot and took off his cloak.
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1.英语幽默小故事
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